Washing, ironing, cooking, cleaning
The work is never done!
Lunching, shopping, relaxing, reading
I’ve heard is much more fun.

Sweeping, mopping, dusting, shining
Who thinks up all these gigs?
But what I really want to know right now
Is who left open the barn door to let in the pigs?

Mowing, weeding, trimming, seeding
Are mans work, but I’m all on my own
I gave birth to a virtual army
But housework is their No Go Zone!

Yelling, screaming, crying, keening
Achieves naught but my puffy face
I’ve given up such futile exercises
That puts no one in their place.

I hear “Can you help me please”
They hear “Blah Blah Blah”
Maybe I need to learn sign language
One gesture can go so far!

To this end I have ultimately decided
And I really do think this is for the best
To sit right down with drink in hand and
Let the little piggies wallow in their own mess!

24/07/2010

I'm seriously thinking of making
A mixtape page of all my poems
Taking out my favorite lines
From all of the ones that I've wrote

Putting them all together
Down onto one page
Then label it quite proudly
My poetry mixtape

Sort of like a greatest hits
All of the stuff that I'm proud
Ask a few friends what they'd like in the mix
May take time but I'll figure it out

I'll fill it up with happy stuff
Add a few lines that are sad
Even throw in a bit of humor
So halfway through I'll get a laugh

Then I'll take it with me out to the streets
Along with a portable mic
Read it out loud to the maddening crowds
Perhaps breaking up a few fights

They'll be hugging and kissing in no time
Dancing in line to the rhymes
Passing out copies of my mixtape poetry page
So they too can recite all the lines

Yes, a mixtape page of my poetry
Might be just the thing to do the trick
The more I'm thinking of this idea
The more I'm liking it

GOD says to me with a kind
of smile, "Hey how would you like
to be God awhile And steer the world?"
"Okay," says I, "I'll give it a try.

Where do I set?
How much do I get?
What time is lunch?
When can I quit?"

"Gimme back that wheel," says GOD.
"I don't think you're quite ready YET."