Do you know the feeling?
Air being forced from your breast
Drowning, without water
Air, close, but no regard
Heart ahammer

I remember the feelings
Desperate
Clawing
Panicking
Betrayal
And
Fear

It came as a surprise
But inside I knew
Denying my instincts
Something about him changed
Uninterested, just motions

I had found his letters to her
Pictures of him, so far from home
Sent to her, what I asked for
I pleaded, almost cried for
Attempts to be close

Lies, left out for me to see
Couldn't even delete the evidence
A thorough betrayal of heart

I see it now again
Youth, another heart to be broken
What has happened once
Will happen again
Do these men know?
What a woman can feel?
Cuts her down, destroys her

On one hand, beautiful words
Promises and dreams
Trust misplaced
Eating at the soul
Ignoring her

Deepest emotions
But worn on the sleeve
A pattern of pain
I can only imagine
Her devotion true
Every thought of him
Her love's warm hold

He strays, first nothing
But words, beautiful words
Time spent away, he stays away
Writing with intention
Emotionally ******

Broken promises
Vows, turned lies
To have and to hold, *******
For better or worse, lies
Til death do we part, only when I die

And that's me
Dead now, a small part
Never did we speak
About how I felt
How he made me feel
That crushing weight
That put nails to my coffin

I see the pattern again and again
I cannot believe the strength it would take
To go past something like that
Men, liars and cheats
Don't they know how their words
Become actions, words build

All lies

Close and closer still
Dry your beautiful tears
My arms around you
Gotten me through
Too many nights

Our legs entwined
Warmth, twilight's touch
Sun kissed in candle light
Blood red fingered tipped
Your eyes hooded
But sparkling and bright
Take you in rapture

But that's not why I'm with you
My Little Biscuit, it's much more than lust
That's only physical,
A moth to the flame
A search untamed

You are elemental in nature
A wind, gusting, a blade
Your voice, beautiful
Rage, unadulterated pain
You are the mirror
To which fire
Measures flame

Anxiety and fear
Blacken out your light
If you allowed unveiling
All the world, frozen
Like I saw you in dress

From the first moment I saw you
To worst in fight, your hand raised to strike
Always I loved you, always my life
Unconditional love
Love at first sight
You mock, deny and bite
But in a moment I loved you
Changed my whole life

I am learning to love you
Everyday, a new light
Your brightness, my devotion
Your plight is my fight
If you'll let me have might

Tell you, ok
Everything's alright
We'll get through this
Together, love
Commitment and tight

Everyday
No matter the fight
However the mood
I tell you so much
Power is lost from the words

A romantic, sometimes
Broken hearted
But always, falling
To bloodied knees
Touching your face
A kiss, my love
To your lips, my Love

Dreams of your smile
Your softest touch
Just holding your hand
Touching your side
And pulling you close

I love you
Like the ocean
Can't control the dam
Like the highest mountains
Stretching for the skies
Like the moon and the stars
No heaven without you

Beats of my heart
A dance of the soul
Moon song's mournful cries
I want you in my arms
Need you close to my touch

I believe in you
Bright eyes when I first asked you
To be exclusively mine
To let me be just and only yours
I held you in my arms
And held you too long
Held you too tight

I remember when I asked you again
Surprise on your face
Tear in your eye
I asked you to love me
In a field, far from the lights

There was a starry night to witness
What better honor to love
Than twinkling lights
Ask you to marry me
Vow to preserve
Promise to love
Protect and help

Sometimes we fight
Brutal passions erupt
I split and desire
To take you
And hold

Wipe away your tears
Give you comfort
Devour your fears
I am not perfect
Sometimes I fail
But together
We strive

I love you like water
Overcoming and blind
You are my heart's song
My every tide
Every desire

At first glance
You were untouchable
Beauty made physical
Ethereal, perfect
Sweater red, jeans blue

You said I was unreadable
Couldn't see what, why
I paused because I was stunned
Lost my words, I was in love
The first time consumed
Couldn't keep my heart in its place
It's drum, total unrest

Up the stairs, I followed
I would follow you anywhere
To the grave, ashes mixed
Barely, I could speak
My throat clenched

We drove for a while
Even now, memories awash
I gathered my courage
Touched your hand at a light
We had talked through letters
Long through the night, but
Nothing to prepare me, for the touch

You dressed for the night
Dinner, enchiladas, steak and that night
I froze when I saw you
Still to this day
You'll never grow older
My heart beat much harder
Eyes upon you, a moment told you

We drank red wine and each other
Hours, in the night
A massage, you were bolder
We held hands, yours so soft
First time, all I wanted
But in time I asked you
For a kiss that smoldered

That night I saw you
With lips, outlined dark
Perfect, quivering in dream
Bottom, pouting and plump
Curves, tender and touched

I kissed you with fire
Melted ice volcanic
Worshipped your body
But all in love with your soul
Made love in the candles
Held you while nightmares racked
That too short night

But I'll always remember
Our first kiss in twilight
Your eyes were unknowing
That my lips
Kissed in love

It's a testament to strength
The building or rebuilding
Of love
Where it was once fallen
It grows once more
Stronger now
Far more, evermore

When you look to its eyes
You can't see it without
Looking inward at your own self
Replace all the negative you find
And replace with your lover's eyes

A self, so fragile
With the baggage of a lifetime
Ego and pride to tell yourself
Not to break
An already broken heart
But to mend, heal
The goal of true love

One day at a time
Brings the closure to wounds
Replacing all those words
Fat, skinny, empty, fear
Washing over anxiety

Love exists, it breathes
With every embrace
A needed hug, a quick kiss
When he looks at you
Asks what he can do
Kisses you goodnight
Blesses you good morning

It's the time spent
The commitment of love
With his every breadth
Every touch, every glance
He loves me

It is a rule
For a cheating heart
If you do it once
You will again
Time will prove

How ever you justify
How ever you cry
Cheating is hard
It makes secrets
And lies
Hidden accounts
Words have power

Choices always tower
Tell yourself it's nothing
Emotionless ties
But it's the lies to yourself
Undermine your pride

The rules are simple
To one you are tied
Forever is forever
Love does not die
Your cheating heart
Deny, deny
Only to yourself

Always you lie