the spider in the corner saw a cry for help.
the man by the mirror saw them dead from the heights.
the man by the mirror plead for their lives.

one of
the greatest gifts that has
been presented is an
empty book and a pen

i didn't mean to bring any one down,
but when you hit such a point of no return, you do hope someone finds a way that helps you up.

in odysseys of my life,
I'd recourse in the warmth
of the simplest of sunlights.

the wound the wound,
yes, the wound.
it is still there
for it has not
yet healed to
a scar.

hold me tight.
my body yearns for touch.
kiss me swell
my heart a wishing well.

could you love me in gridlock
grand service to my emptiness
you can reach into my depths
for us to understand your power.

it's funny what you begin learning
when betrayal lashes your innocence.

it's hysterical how I advocated
for every man you hated,

your misandristic tendencies.
a third eye blind to your tumultuous ingrained lies.
weaponizing my mind.

a fourth guy in line for another brutal cut that you align with no sight.

"i'm starting to forget what my mother's face looks like.", I exclaimed knowing reality deduced the same.
those younger days that that mind began being ****** into the obsidian darkness.

i still cant see as much good as i used to.
but, then again, one need not rely on just the eyes for sight, especially on these sheer nights.

the angels are the lilies
the ponds are the clouds
the fairies are flying like the pixies
the butterflies are the reeds
the breezes are the glades
the cicadas are the shore

the problem with the present
is that it implies we are above the past.

our flawed existence
has always been waiting
for our rules to bend and break
to show we are as equal as the
animal that we are integrated from.

our rules, still evolving or adapting,
are the only code that leaves us more
than a beastly vestage. the brain that makes our mind does not have to further to action.

I've been in a series of doubt and belief.
I hear so many different things
but they're spoken on low volume, I couldn't be away from them if I tried, and I tried. I'll never be alone.
Conjecture and logic with a little sprinkle of hope and conviction,
I'd like to think I know anything about you.
You're a figment of my mind, a touch of my spirit, I sense you through grapevines and dreams.
I conversate with walls and windows and I wonder if it's truely you, if you're truely there.
He says that you are, and I trust that, even if it may be lies.
It's all for a purpose.
It has praise and it has shame,
sometimes it hurts to have a little faith.

i **** in my tears
stand there sinking them in my eyes
just so my skin can stay dry
through a canal built on my bones
its river rushes against its ramparts
lucious waterfalls into my organs
and out of my soul
but fills that well of some Old.

i've been searching for a spell to bring you back.
some line of words
with the right magical meaning
to lead you back to our love.

to a happy cheerful world
where dreams run like rivers.
where hurt is nothing but a past tense.

i wasn't worth the energy.
i wasn't worth, but a thing.

i say to myself,
"
you are worth this energy.
you are the worth of every thing.

"

ive been in your position more
than i care to admit,
thats why i can tell you with certainty
that what you are breeding is all just a *******

what is so wrong with the name ana?
I dont understand it all
and I can get quite emotional;
but,
Ana.

Sometimes your wisdom supercedes me.
It's hard understanding you to my wilds, but there are truthes that
glimmer gold flecks as much as your.
I'm up in debate nowaday whether it even be good or right to ever stake you a piece my mind; only if you've the same I suppose. I just wish someone came along to save me for once- to invade my sense and lay me home. I hope my worth would speak through myself; that my very nature be loved and nurtured by a warm touch.

open yourself up to me
so I can leave you in the misery
I helped create.

here i am integrating myself through electronical internet connectivity.
i will eventually integrate myself with the blissful nature connectivity.

what a thoughtful idiot

deep within
a discordant tone
stirs my mind
vibrates the glass
of my body
but never shatters;
this essense,
a storm in the bottle.

i don't want to know
what happens when it breaks
but i need to know, and
ive known that to be: life is long

for some odd reason,
we are all blessed
if we believe
we are chanced
to be.

you fell from grace.
your wisdom only goes so far,
without it.
your elegance, oh,
how i miss the days
ignorance was the meaning.
the heart has opened
and the beast speaks now
and forever more of the soul and
emotion wrought.

I'll sprint through the grasses
and dare each acrobatic-
like soccer in summer
or a wild animal in wilderness.

She would bark at me when wanting love.
I would come close she would run away.
the nature of us all, sometimes she'd try biting me.
Fight or flight, i looked to calm, yet no way around another's fear
(the opposite of love)
but maybe through it?
I figured to bond, she saw what I saw as her potential,
She fought for the attention that was accepted from another (that acceptance key to a heaven indeed). Attacking her brother, her eyes said, "was i right ? was i wrong? Should i try another?".
Trying to show you its acceptable to be on her level.
"Sure ill come" i said with poised humility,
Because i still loved you the same, always as equals. again
Id come, youd run, id throw you a bone,
I had loved to see you as you had grown, love not lacked, brought it back(look she knew how to do that!), pride's layers overlapped of every sense of touch, god I loved that, as I pet your hair back.
Never expressed how much i was impressed,
But still then after, id love in my way to show you it made my day, you would run.
you wanted to still be in my focus, for i think it made you stronger, you were the enemy, reflected that hurt me as I'd hurt another.
i had made a vow to never try to harm another.
Our possible deeds natured in weeds. Possible age of love to still be seen. And when you fought me itd hurt me, and id leave in defeat; you, barking behind me. And maybe one day you wont see me the monster you see me. Maybe one day we could love so freely. But for now it seems we both are on matural's leave.
I just wish i could communicate for you to comprehend, and im sorry my heart feels too heavy for anything to rend.

some building of something new
was still of me and you.

I can see the pollen course
through the air like this
valley were a vein.
It would be a shame
to be allergic to the
lifeblood of nature.
If only there were
pedals slowly flowing,
would be beautiful.

Ya, no-
I'm certainly not really all that good at what I do.
my words land in mud
but I'm calmed by the quicksand.
and please just swallow me Earth-
your demands are too oppressive
and your reasoning too foreign.

Comfort has distanced far but from the ghosts
of the skies.
and any touch I am gifted are shoals in drought.
like eternal fasting.
but I never mean to appeal to pity, yet it can appeal to me.
and sometimes I am strong, but it's in vain.
and sometimes I am weak, but I lack further.

At least I can tell it to your face I am not depressed.
Nor cry a tear unrighteous.
Nor will I die from my own hand-
Ya, no. not me.
I know the privilege that is life.
I can at least be proud of that, right ?

And for when I sink, my mind keeps begging the question, "what happens in May?".

I want to write evil poetry
Where you are the villian
but I can't

the love I've lost
(Make it your fault)

We could have been high school sweethearts
Marriage with all our loved ones

(Dancing in our suit and ties)
(Ya right)

I wish that could be true
But our time isn't right

Maybe you'll come back
In another life

I await you
(In earnest longitude)

You're the poem
I wish to express
to the whole wide world
in intimate hours

I'm in drunk celebration
Wondering if it could have
been us..

But probably not.
Maybe someone else-
a different story.

the more i get pushed down
the more i push on up.

time heals all wound

and when the scars settle,

the imperfections

make beauty

you were someone I trusted

and that's all that mattered

I was a sucker for your name

and you helped me regardless of input

I went through Hell again,

still searching for Heaven

and I find my way

better each time

you think you can't
but I feel you can.
I know what it's like
to be human,
it's surprising how
similar each of us
really is
at the core.

I hear you in between
life and death,
hear the words you
won't use around the
ones you will.
I'm not crazy,
I'm what I want to
be within,
when your mind is
more than your own
God blesses us
with his love.

you looked happier in the past

I wonder if it'll last

life came quick, it sure was fast

changed the movie, changed the cast

if you feel not in control-

you are the paintbrush and
the world is the canvas in
which you paint.
with words, with actions
with thoughts, with everything.
if I am the paintbrush,
then who or what is the artist
painting ?
is it me ?
is it you ?
is it us ?
could it be everyone ?
do I allow you to use me ?
to write what it is
the audience so pleases ?
and are we all paintbrushes ?
and, if so, is each to a collection
of which is the art ?

where is the source of your ink ?
for a pen is like a brush.
and what pictures are drawn from it ?

and how do you love ?
is it so openly a suggestion
you breath it out like air ?
you breath it in like perfume ?

well, the woods are starting to burn again,
and I can not deny that it smells fantastic.

slowly the clock strikes
slooowllllly
time a meer mirage-
an illusion that imprisons
us to what one is told to do.
slooowlllly
night becomes day.
foreseen infinite concieves me, as I concieve it.
prayers of eons in but hours.
the love of relation: you being there to become with me, as I, you.
all while in a timeless space.
sanctuary, in any darker room
slooowlllly.☆

it's taken years of insanity
to understand any good in the evil intended things
it took you seconds to say.

some days i awaken from
past memories'
embrace.
hating today but
longing to love tomorrow.

I feel she's letting go,
I'm still a part of her drift.
she's been watching and
hoping for me-
another angel of my guard;
she will find me in someone
else lovely,
and he will
be her
reminder.

hold me in your arms-
as tender if we were
to leave tomorrow evening.
for i want to know the future,
but we always die so
suddenly.
please understand,
you deserve it just as
well.
find me;
where I am
within any other.

open yourself up to me
so you can join me in the heaven
you helped create.