gnarled like teeth, twisted IV and  
no thought common sensical, but
skewed thoughts burning calories
hospitals, helping hands
ignorant to this:
emotional,
physical,
I am
sick.

bitterness, resentment, and envy
looked upon with disdain unmatched
crippling lack of confidence,
plagued with a jaundiced eye
security gone
incompetent
feelings now
haunt me
help

calling me, ensuring our safety
worried, affection unequaled
and this wasn't the first time
"better safe than sorry"
unparalleled bunch,
forever friends,
genuine
unmatched
love

I wish I could decipher you
insufficient explanation construed
words may fail and logic falter,
the account I'd never alter

a beautiful culmination
purposed, intricate summation
as poetic as a psalter,
the account I'd never alter

transcendent, pleasant mystery
exquisite, written history
content, soaring past the vaulter
the account I'd never alter

I wish I could decipher you
the account I'd never alter

wrapped in your embrace, fears erase
sole act of vicarious kindness
naught benevolence, sincere face
from you: security, guidance

uneasy apprehension, stilled
acceptance of endless madness
fatherly void, pleasantly filled
from you: security, guidance

nostalgic'ly nestled; hidden,
serene poise, sharing my sadness
dismal submission: forbidden  
from you: security, guidance

wrapped in your embrace, fears erase
from you: security, guidance

slithering snake, clenches your throat
wraps mind, squeezes life from your veins
energy enemy, bitter bloat
daunting journey, lurking shadows

constricted, conflicted outcast
unable to free from the chains
worn down from life's toll, heavy past
daunting journey, lurking shadows

forbidden to fail, forced to eat
crying, trying, relationship strains
internally free, dinner feat
daunting journey, lurking shadows

conquered mind war, truce to take care
bare me, scary, all that remains
victorious I rise, baptized
daunting journey, lurking shadows