be my therapist

massage both my temples
from whence these poems originate

will your fingertips perform tailored alterations,
will they insert strange spices and your favors,
unfamiliar but imagined overtime desirable flavors,
thus resolving the question that my answers perpetually fail,
to satisfy my unending need to understand:

how do my temples
speed the heart
bring forth whole poem utterances inconceivable,
reminding me to remember what has yet to occur?

she grins, whimsies me and suggests:

that’s why they have been
appointed anointed announced as the
Temples of You

2:19am 2/19/18

This is a path for lost wanderers
When you feel like your heart is lost and nowhere to go
When your thoughts and words are tangled and wouldn’t flow
Where do I step my feet and escape this labyrinth?

Though crest of waves may devour me
Into the deepest void of the turquoise-blue
I am prepared to swirl the seas
Wind might gravitate me away and set me in an unknown place
One step forward for my soul urges me to take the journey

Realms may turn upside down
Hearts may sink or soar
How do I unmoor and
Where do I go?

A lost traveler with the passion of wandering
Aimlessly searching yet desires to be found
Being alive is a peculiar feeling
Even though my soul is in the state of healing

In a world with myriad of twists
Life is hard to decipher and puzzling to exist
But I shall keep my armor on
With the spirit as dauntless as a lion

For a missing wanderer like me
Fate will lead me to where I’m supposed to be
Whether roaming around cities and voyaging continents
Unraveling maps that contain memories

Finding my way back to where it all began
Retracing lost trails with a compass in my hand
No matter where I incessantly roam
My heart will always find a way to a place called home.

Suicide is my way of being free,
Crawling out of the hole I created.
Suicide is the only way out of the pain, I feel.
Can't run from it, always a step behind.
The worst is that i'm trapped in my own mind.

My fake smile is getting heavier, can't hold it for much longer,
My eyes can't hold back. Done living in the dark, going through motions. I think its time to give up & be free.

~Aishah

Now as I feel nothing,
My body shakes in fear.
That what I once did to it,
Will happen again.
Now when that blade comes near,
A tear comes from my eye.
Because I promise never to cut again.
But now here I am trembling with pain.
This pain I cannot bother.
The long sleeves that I wear,
Are really are ******.
Now that you’ve seen what I’ve done,
My time is running out.
For what I once feared,
I now lust for it.
That death will come near.
And I wont feel pain anymore,
And that I have died
I want you to know
That everything you have done to me
Killed me inside
That this pain I have suffered from,
Has now become unbearable.