I shouldn't be frustrated.
I should not be mad.

But something inside me,
Tells me I am.

I've denied the feeling,
Whatever it is.

To try and be happy.
Shall I begin?

You met up with her,
You guys are just friends.

I trust your decisions,
To my very ends.

But something inside me,
Crawls to my head.

Starts complaining,
A small shallowly beg.

Get out I will say,
Every time!

But it tells me.
That you're not only mine?!

This creature comes,
Quite often I believe.

I goes by a name,
Jealousy.

But that's not the only name,
It goes by so many.

The green eyed like grass,
Somethimes even envy.

I despise it greatly,
If only I could see.

That this creature or....feeling,
Is a part...of me.

As you can see,
I've never been a prodigy.
Always unimpressive, apparently.
Stressing is an everyday thing.
But you wouldn't care,
You're just so unaware.
Depression has me ensnared,
But you couldn't handle my despair.
So keep your eyes closed.
And I'll do the same.
The things I think about are completely insane,
I wish the good times would never change.
But this isn't my dreamland.
It's a place where I don't want to stand.
Depression is the ocean,
Anxiety is the sand,
And I'm somewhere floating in between it all.

You miss a meal,
Then it turns to two,
A day passes,
And no one notices you.

Craving nutrition,
There goes a week,
Those many hours,
Longing for something to eat.

Using the same excuse,
"I'm not hungry, I just ate,"
The numbers keep dropping,
Was sixty-three, now fifty-eight.

You can't go back,
People are noticing you,
They say you should eat, and you say,
"You have something better to do."

It's harder than you think,
Just leave me alone!
Stop telling me to eat and drink!
If I need you, I can find my phone.

Ideas are better than reality.
In your mind,
Things are so much more,
Colorful and glossy.
With your expectations raised high,
And a brightness in your eye,
All for harsh reality
To splash cold water in your face.
And turn everything
Into dull blues, blacks, and grays.

I'll give you my fingers,
If I get your bones,
You can have my arms,
If I can take your skull.

You can take my heart, beating, from my chest,
I'll have yours in return,
If it isn't the best.

I'll give you my thoughts, wrapped up in saran,
If I can have your dreams,
The fastest in your clan.

It'll be a trade-off,
So easy you'll see,
So take me and I'll take you,
We'll fill in those empty spots,
That just won't do.

When I open my eyes,
the world comes undone
What do I see? How do I know?
If the space in front of me is actual

The clock on the wall measures in tic and toc,
but what about all of the space in between?
The place where dreams exceed and monsters feed
The true birthplace of the human race
A chaotic embrace we try to disgrace
As time we say, should know its place

I’d love to scream, would that seem real?
To escape my chains and flee the pain
No longer restrained in the structural day
Away from the eyes that peer through the window frame

No, I’m not zoning out,
just planning a breakout