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Vika Oct 2024
I watch my mother beg for love by God ,
The same way I begged for her love once

We are quite similar ,
Longing for something that is not there

Expect she looks up to a God ,
And I look up to my mother
I wrote this when I was 12 and highkey it still hits
D Oct 2024
be good to me, okay?

when the weather changes
please stay the same

even if I push you out
please say you'll stay

just as the sun goes down
and rises again

just know that someday
I'll be back again

no matter when
no matter why

no matter where
no matter how

pour into me
I'll spread my wings for you

cause there's no point in this
if it's not with you

and if my faith isn't enough
at least I yearned for you

and that would be my greatest accomplishment
experiencing life with you

so be good to me, okay?
and I'll do the same for you.
Wary Oct 2024
What hurts more?
Is it the void of your absence,
Silent, consuming, endless—
Or the torment of dreams,
Where I hold you, only to lose you at dawn?
Longing for your every passing day
Leila Sep 2024
Time aways I remember you tangled in the crook of my neck
Your half lidded eyes
such a gentle boy
Accursed it may seem
Agonized inside these walls
You were desperate for my touch
as I am for yours now

Cruelty bespeaks me
how many dead lay in your path
how many lay in mine
Exhausted I would feel
Your hand lazily cupped over my breast
Squeezed and pumped through

Even now my skin burns
this lust only awakes for you
How pathetic that must be
Wanting so desperately
I would tear my teeth out just for another taste

Instead I lay numb in my bed
Trying hard to forget
Trying hard not to care
Trying hard not to want
Failure creeps in on me
You pound through my head
In the most unexpected places I catch your glimpse
I wonder if I could turn back time
My salty tears dripping on your chest
Your arms reluctantly holding me
How could I forget?

I tainted what good came my way
Come to me again
Forgive me
I begged for you not to let me go
I turn to ash and crumble
My skin has already been picked at
I forgot how to breathe

The overwhelm has beaten me to a pulp
Do I breathe heavy
my limbs feel limp against my sides
Wave crash over my chest
My words fail me
Any critiques and comments are welcome!
Wary Sep 2024
While flipping through the pages of our memory book,
I found those dried flowers, and with them, your memory bloomed once again…
That even after all this time, my heart, still aching for you,
Surrendered its fragile hope of living in your yearning and crumbled, drop by drop.
Memories never fades
Erwinism Sep 2024
A warped mirror perhaps?
My face always twisted,
always grimacing behind a dry beam.
Two Tylenols are never enough.

Ella.
A lump caught in my throat.  
Her scent walks by,
uninvited, yet welcomed.

A blurred outline,
a cutout blocking the light.
I yearn to sweat nightmares
out of my pores.

At night, her voice still fogs
the thick wall of silence—
muffled.
“Are you listening?”
Obscured echoes stir
down the pit of this endless night.

Tulips grow somewhere
on the side of the bed,
where it whirrs and beeps,
and reeks of alcohol.  
But the night is ever still,
unperturbed, as it sleeps in my arms.

Murmurs drift like dust motes,
caught in a sunbeam—

Ella.
I chase shadows of her laughter,
fading out against gushing white noise.  
Fingers twitch to speak,
for words are somehow
lost in static.

The walls hum a song,
croaking with hurt it sounds—
“Stay with me,” it pleads,
but my indifference swallows
the words.

In the spaces between breaths,
I linger suspended.
Ella might be digging me out.
Oka Sep 2024
What could have been of us
if they were out of the picture
would your cheeks rest in the clusps
of my palms, would you rupture
a vein below my dry bottom lips?

These dry hands grasp for any sense,
my head wishes it was ever more dense,
this weary heart rushes aimless,
but even then, yearning is just so effortless

What could have been of us
if the weight of your words was gold
if I were just a little bit more bold,
prudent, even. Never my tongue hold,
would I know that reciprocate was an answer?
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