She loves me, she loves me not.

That is the cycle life had adapted for me to ride, through day and night, then sunshine and rain.

It feels as if a sickening game, what is life daring for me to partake? A dangerous charade where both of us find ourselves staring out into nothing.
—the clock ticks once.. then twice... Not a third.


She looks at me with those eyes so that I cannot help but crave her embrace, it is wrong for me to be so.. selfish.
Must you look at me like that as while slipping you're hand into mine?

As the seasons begin to shift, a whole other cycle once again spirals much like that of an aimless soap opera plot.
Yearning, solemness, jealousy, then departure. Again.. and again...

I am filthy, but please... do not toss me away, you promised.. you promised that if I gave you my heart and soul, the world would be mine through you're eyes.

Yet only half.. of that deal had been transacted, I am now nothing but a robot without batteries.
I am scared..
I feel disgusted...

Just a minute longer within you're warmth before you go, he was right.
I should have stopped and glanced into the other direction that day, the day that you had looked at me the way that turns my stomach in knots now..

Will you be mine? My Valentine?
—no, I know that you love another.
But I can't... I cannot stop thinking of you.

I shall be you're precious doll if you ask me too, I will.. I will even set my heart ablaze so you can sleep without the loud beating of my heart beside you.


So why him? That boy who called you that 'girl in my math class'
He won't be good, just as the boy before him and so on..
I love you, I love you much more than I should..

That being the main reason of my despair, the borderline of why I am now sitting in a corner and slowly losing strands of my very hair.
So please.. please... Please.... See me the way I see you my dear.

I want to feel the warmth like those princess's within those fairytales, you're long hair seeping over my shoulders as I feel the embrace I so desperately desire.
Please...
That is all I ask of you...

Be mine, as I shall be yours my dearest..

whenever i see you,
my heart forgets its rhythm,
fluttering like a ghost startled by light.
we never met,
you left before i even touched the earth,
before time could give me a chance
to stand beside you.

still, i know.
if we shared hallways,
if we passed notes in class
instead of fates in silence,
i would’ve been drawn to you.
your twisted mind,
those crooked thoughts,
they call to me.

you were tall,
and your voice,
it haunts soft, like a lullaby for broken things.
maybe if you had seen me
really seen me
maybe then
you would’ve stayed.
maybe then
you would’ve chosen different.