I'm ****** up.
I'm drunk right now.
Isn't it hilarious?
The last time I was like this was two months ago.
Two months ago when I lost my "best" ******* friend.
Make it stop.
Save me from this stupid thing called love.
I'm incapable of true love.
Is it because of him, her, you, me?
I ask like it matters.
I ask like it ever mattered.
Ha, good one...
******* HOLD ME.
Don't touch me.
Come back to me.
Never leave.
She's gone.
It's my fault too.
Who cares though?
I don't because, well, I'm a ******* mess.
I feel nothing.
Nothing at all.
I don't exist.
I'm not dead.
I'm just nothingness.
I'm nothingness wishing for a drip.
An IV drip.
Drip from the Molly.
The drip from the X.
Numbness from the narcotics.
Kiss me.
Leave me.
I'll rock your world.
Then ask you to go.
I'm saving you.
I promise.

Dear Math,
I wrote this letter to let you know how I feel about you. The thing is much as you love me so much, we can never be an Item when all you do is torture my brain and break my heart.
You claim to be a linguist, yet you know none of my languages. You don't know Kiswahili neither do you know English and only speak Algebra and statistics...I loathe you for all you do is play on my mind with words like Sigma and Meu, factorial and co-factor.You claim you want to be the only one but still ask me to find your X without even telling me Y.Well, grow up and solve your own problems because I'm tired of solving them for you.Just walk out of my life forever and not temporarily like the dew. You have hurt me enough with razors of matrices, pinched me simultaneously and never asked me whether I believed in your ancient beliefs like those of Pythagoras or not. We were never meant to be. I found a new one, her name is literature and she loves me so much.I won't apologize for saying I hate you because It's unfair apologizing for saying the truth.
Yours with anger

I've lost my mind.
Somewhere down the line.
Maybe I set it down to parachute the pill.
Maybe I set it down to light the grass.
Maybe I set it down to drink to the last drop.
Maybe I set it down to light the cancer.
Should I even pick it up?
It's probably covered in dust and filth.
Part of me is glad that it's gone.
Why would I trade a vice for a thought?

The child discarded in the storm was lost as lonesome sheep.
The flowers in the garden there did bow their heads and weep.
The tears that flowed did nurture and develop a perfect chrysalis.
And as the morning mists did rise a fragile butterfly hit the skies.
A magnificence of purple pause an emperor for a day.

The sun came out, burned out all  the pain of rain.
The child smiled it's heart was made of joy.
As once upon a time the child was born a boy.
Glory and magnificence made magic from the raindrops craft.
For now the gorgeous girl child, she lived, she loved, she laughed.
(C) Livvi

how is your heart?

felt my heartbeat and got humbled