“I have something for you to remember me by,” said Tim.

    He held a little foam Hippo – the lone play animal supplied by the loonybin to patients in need.

     It was brand new – just as every Hippo looked – and I wondered why he’d chosen something seemingly impersonal in comparison to his other, odd gifts.

     However, what he did next made his hippo – my hippo – absolutely ideal. To people like Tim and I, that is.

     For, to my astonishment, he casually took the toy in his hands, twisted, and ripped it cleanly  in two.

     He ripped off its head, which he gave to me, whilst he kept the body.

    I will never get rid of that mutilated, foam hippo head. For he understood what no one else had ever come near.

     In this way – perhaps – Tim and I became synonyms. Synonyms for what ignorant perceptions would later christen ******, or merely, crazy (the latter - coined by those who remain too depressingly colloquial to invent unfounded diagnoses).

     These epithets, catalyzed post personifying such societal taboos as Tim or I committed, follow me still, and have yet to disperse.
  
     A criticaster disaster, personified.

     Yes; in this way – Tim and I became synonymously insane.


•

There is a haze over him
He could fight it, muster all strength to overcome it
But to what end? There is nothing to see here
Just pastel yellows and men of ill-intent.

Other prisoners crowd around the trough.
Like cattle.
But not him.
He’s special.
They can’t see the poison in the sky.
They don’t know they’re watching.
This is a prison for special people.
People whose eyes are too sharp.
People who know too much.

But they succumbed.
They ate the meat of the temple.
They became domesticated.
They gave up their sight for creature comforts

He is not like them.
He is stronger. He is smarter.
The abattoir will not be silent when it is his turn.
He will not go gently.

Yiska slits
her thin wrist
-broken glass

in a bin
in the ward
what a find-

the blood comes
plentiful
beautiful

she reckons
sitting back
in the bath

of water
motherly
and warming

reddening
but a nurse
on duty

looking to
tell Yiska
the doctor

wanted her
finds her there
in the bath

drifting off
and blood soaked
EMERGECY

SUICIDE
the nurse yells
up the ward

-locked up ward
those who are
mentally

unstable
are caged here-
I am in

the main lounge
looking out
the window

snows falling
some robin
perches there

on a branch
Yiska said
earlier

she'd make it
out of here
one way or

the other
there's a rush
of nurses

and a quack
follows up
half way through

-I'm guessing-
his breakfast
there's egg yoke

at the side
of his mouth
poor Yiska

so depressed
no way out
she told me

but I guess
watching the
brave robin

sitting there
that there is
if you look

really hard
to get out
out somewhere.

Nima waits
in her bed
on the ward

it's twilight
and she feels
a great urge

for some ***
but Benny
is at home

at his place
and others
on the ward

are sleeping
all women
some are old

few are young
even the
young night nurse

in her small
cramped office
off the ward

seldom comes
to visit
at that hour

she tries to
picture in
her dazed mind

Benny there
beside her
kissing her

holding her
his fingers
exploring

her body
his wet lips
on her neck

on her *******
on the dip
of her *****

on her *****
but he's not
there at all

just her lips
wet kissing
where she can

O Benny
come to me
be my man.

The skies are grey
The curtains blue
bed sheets white
and scrub sets seal
no phone, no tv
no outside for me

i’m in four walls
where it’s actually
the safest place to be