It's not my fault,
I didn't mean it,
If I belong with *REJECTS

I can’t see the things you say.
You say that you care and that you love me,
but when I’m around you I feel useless ... worthless.
I have few things in this world that make my life worth living
and those are the things that you threaten to take away
that you threaten to get rid of.
I have cuts on my hips that you have never seen.
That you have never known about.
And when i look at them I see your name.
Oh, but don’t worry I see my father’s name as well.
They appear because it’s the only way I can feel
something other than worthless after speaking with you.
You don’t understand that when you yell
when you tell me I’m not even trying
that you ‘ll take away the only things that keep me alive
I feel horrible.
I feel worthless.
I feel like I don’t matter and that I never have.
You want me to be my sister…
you want me to be you,
but I can’t change who I am.
I am my own person and I guess that isn’t a good thing
at least not in this family.
You carried me for nine months
you gave birth to me.
you raised me.
But you shove me down and take my life away
because it doesn’t suit the way you want things.
The way you want me to be.
I’m sorry I have an opinion that’s not yours
and that I fight for what I believe and think
rather than submitting to your will.
I’m sorry I’m not good enough for you.
I’m sorry that you ever had a second daughter.
I’m sorry I’m here.
I’m sorry...

I'm empty inside
No one can See
Through the flesh mask
They wan't me to be

I am just a useless body
With a useless mind
In a useless world
Offending it's kind

I'm a defect, used by this world
It's useless for me
I should be gone
So something better can be

worth is not in my vocabulary,
I am without it.
there is no worth around me,
no value or importance.
leaving myself to believe
that worth is just a construct.
I will not focus on it,
for I am utterly useless.
holding on to anything
that will get me through the day,
nothing that contains worth.
there is no point in the world,
yet I am still searching for it.

My heart is overflowing with abundant love,
Spilling like my useless tears.
All this love, trapped inside my heart
And no one to share it with.

I stare at this beautiful soul,
Hopping one day to fall as hard as he did,
To feel his heart beat in my bones
But that bubbly feeling I should get is just coal,
Coal that rots in the pit of my stomach.

But my lover prefers to stay hid,
Who knows when I'll fall again...

Who knows...

Incapable.
I'm unable,
to function,
amongst them.

I cannot be saved..

Living within this world caught up in technologys embrace.

I exist,
contributing nothing to society,
Like a dead battery.

Incapable.
Useless.

I cannot be saved!

Add me to the list of show horses who've kissed a gun

I'm tired of beeing the beaten one.
No fun.

Sick of beeing the last man to run
I feel like eventually I'll amount to someone
But till that day I'm just a body.
My sports have become  hobies
Sleeping in hotel lobies.
Giving gobbies for coins
There is no fruit in my *****
Just an ache that lies in the wake of my discrimination.
Acting alongside my procrastination
No longer will my forehead bead with
Precipitation

I have become a man that could disappoint a nation