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Sketcher Oct 2018
You want to love, and you want to die,
You think you are above all the lies,
You can perceive with the greatest of eyes,
You know your path and you can't deny,
That your end is nearing, it's close by,
Today you will end it all, so you cry,
You put on a white suit and black tie,
You want to feel something one last time,
You take out a knife and cut deep in your thigh,
******, but ready to go off to school,
Leaving the knife, bringing a gun as your tool,
The scenery changed, and the weather is cool,
The colors all blend and the sounds interlude,
Your vision is blurry and gray like your mood,
You quickly notice that the barrel protrudes,
You hide it better before you are pursued,
By one of those stupid law keeping dudes,
That would destroy your destiny, how rude,
Entering school as an intelligent senior,
Always showing a quiet, somber demeanor,
Looking oddly fancy today, a lot cleaner,
Eyeing down some guys that look a whole lot meaner,
Waiting thirty minutes till' she arrives, you're eager,
To carry out your plan, you are today's grim reaper,
Sitting anxious at a table, a nervous creeper,
Ready to attack janitors or the grounds keeper,
Chattering and a message over the loud speaker,
All sounds blend together, the whispers and the shouts,
Waiting for what seems like ages, you have your doubts,
You think she might just not come to school and you pout,
While other kids show off their Gucci, Supreme clout,
See her walk in and your sweating, but sturdy and stout,
Your stomach is the famine, your mouth is the drought,
You walk up to her to show her what your about,
Thoughts can't be contemplated, and words can't be spout,
So, you press against her lips as you blow your brains out.
Nicole Oct 2018
At some point in college
I was dating my first long-term girlfriend
She knew about my being trans
But we didn't talk about it too much
Sometime during that period
She told me that
She didn't think that she could
Stay with me if I made the choice
To take hormones
Or to get bottom surgery
At that point in my life
I didn't want to lose her or that love
So I decided that I didn't want those things anymore
That I felt good enough without them
Now that it's been a few years
I'm just realizing that I lied to myself
I chose to repress those desires
In order to preserve my relationship
And it took three years after that
To even realize what I'd done to myself
amber Oct 2018
you crush him
beneath your feet
you turn him
into nothing more
than broken glass
I see your toes
gushing blood
Char Oct 2018
watched in her cage with blazing eyes,
a casket was hidden
with hurt and blame
within the hearts of two

She braced
the words and actions of callousness,
the usual,
disrespect

he flamed a stem of anger
in her patient heart
and carved collected wounds
in her bleeding heart,
cloaking her sunlight
within a kaleidoscope

With every fight,
their heart spoke like titanic ships,
screaming chords from broken strings
in sunken seas

with every fight,
she poured her heart and soul to him (once more),
bearing her heart
with unscripted honesty,
reflected in apologies and thought.

with his words spoken,
"I love you. We will fix this,"
tears stream down,
unbroken
but she wonders if the truth is faded
with empty promises,
no action
But for now, I will keep believing in him.
P.S. Critiques on how to improve this would be greatly appreciated! i think i stumbled at the end and it's probably quite confusing
kathryntheperson Sep 2018
he feels sick
and often heavy
his mind is full of sand
he's living in a dream
a reality he cant stand
he scares me with his thoughts
and the conversations in his head
telling me he's happy
but wishing he was dead
i don't understand what goes on in his mind
i'm in love with a mad man
and i'm scared to call him mine
and he's madly in love with me.
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