relinquish your will
not if you want it truly
define it as will

say what you want of me
i'm true to myself
and how i feel
tell me i need to be better
cause you're right
that i should do more
i should
that i could be more
i could
"what do you want though?"
happiness
enough cheddar to see myself fed
i'm no dairy farmer
but cream has filled my head
and now i'm sinking
cause the light man
is now heavier than lead

There are days that I forget myself
Who I was, or what am I supposed to do..
Its as if I'm in an autopilot
Just doing what I do
Yet when the night comes
The tears falls too..

What's wrong with me?..

It’s human nature to search for meaning
In the most meaningless of things.

Then what would you call it
I am here,
and sometimes I stumble,
I am adfrift here;
those parts of me that dread the evening,
when the warm dawn fades along
the crest of hours,
I am waiting on Jehovah,
I am making changes in my minds sky
but I ask Jehovah for his breath of wind,
I need him to rearrange the world behind my eyes.
There are all of these days, these shelves
of moments, I will gratefully wait
through the taunting minutes that spit seconds
in my face, I will make the change
I will pray with all of my rivers,
with the branches of every tree, with the heart
that holds a secret from the darkest of dark,
with the world that God is rebuilding, which was given
out of his love, I will pray through that head
where everlasting light resides atop..
That Jehovah God, keep me there waiting in the reflection
of his loving heart. Please keep loving me, Jehovah.

Giving up is easy
excuses are easier
hard is to stay
and make them work is harder

Our archives were
Hardworker
who invested as
Co-worker
and results weren't flying along colours
and so discarded

Appreciation lies in their patience
Compassionate was their love
Beautiful was their compatibility
Love was theirs
and lovers were they

Options were lame
they wanted long answer type questions
luck wasn't in their list
but she was his destiny

All that never goes
that is preserved prestigious
in our small boxes of memories
that we would never allow to flee
these boxes are ours
and our heart soul all inherited
from him......

Send me a true love
and I will pay it
because I never get it.

I kept walking for forty years;
I had my joys and my tears.

I was a daughter, mother and wife;
I was told that this is life.

I have no regrets.
I have met my targets set.

Then why this question sounds New?
When she asked me “Who are you”?

I fumbled; I stumbled.
But the question is still unanswered.

I am sad, I am nervous;
I was walking with No Purpose.

Maybe it's ok to let it go;
No one else will ever know.

Or, maybe it’s time to walk again;
To finally find “Who I Am”.

I didn't know I was lost until I met you
I'm still lost.
But before, I was lost in the world;
A sea of blue.
Now I'm lost in something new.
Something true.