When words fail what's left?
Song?
My praises singing
Hands?
I gesture, paint worlds with my movements
When words fail do we write?
Put my pen to paper and let the words spread like watercolor
Words
speech, are all I know
Silence is a foreign language to me
When words fail I have little left.
So I pray my words do not fail.
Because words are mine.

[] Isn't it strange how paths can bend and sway,
[] Three years near, yet always worlds away.

[] Same school, same halls, yet never a sign,
[] Until fate decided the stars should align.

[] When the snow fell soft, our worlds entwined,
[] A friendship was born, so perfectly timed.

[] Since that moment, we’ve held on close,
[] Through every test, through highs and lows.

[] Late-night calls and laughter so bright,
[] Cuddles on couches that just felt right.

[] Cards on the table, some *****, some not,
[] Secrets between us that won’t be forgot.

[] He is the warmth when the cold winds bite,
[] A voice that is there to comfort, that tells me, you’ll be alright.

[] He lights up rooms without a clue,
[] His laughter paints even the dullest hue.

[] One hug from him bares the weight,
[] Just 8 seconds, and it all dissipates.

[] He teaches me love, he teaches me trust,
[] That hearts don’t break, they only rust.

[] One day, when we’ve found our way,
[] Our families will grow together, and choose to stay that way.

[] Through every twist and turn that life creates
[] Our bond stands strong and true, it never breaks

[] I’ll always have him, and he’ll have me
[] Side by side, where we’re meant to be.

[ ] I know it's not me

[ ] Never has been

[ ] Never will be

[ ] Yet every time you pull me closer

[ ] Press me to your heart

[ ] I think for just a moment

[ ] You might feel the same way

[ ] It's a foolish thought, I know

[ ] But I can’t help but think it

[ ] When I'm lying next to you

[ ] Our bodies pressed together

[ ] Feeling each other's warmth

[ ] Our heartbeats slow down

[ ] The world fades away

[ ] And you begin to feel like home

[ ]You deny the rumours

[ ] Say "We're just good friends"

[ ] Yet I leave wrapped in the ghost of your cologne, a scent that lingers longer than you ever will

[ ] Your absence makes itself known before you even go, but your gaze never lets me leave

[ ] Our eyes hold stares deep upon each other's souls

[ ] In the quiet, we shift closer, like our bodies know what we won't say

[ ] Like our knees have magnets in them, that always gravitate  

[ ]And don't like to separate  

[ ] But you still say it doesn't mean anything

[ ] I love you

[ ] And I know you love me too

[ ] But you don't know that I love you in a different way

[ ] Because I don't think you feel the same

[ ] And I don't think you ever will  

[ ] So I'll hold you close in the moment  

[ ] Dare not whisper what my heart deeply feels

[ ] You say i love you

[ ]" I love you more "I love you most"

[ ] But the diffrnece between you and I is you mean it platonically  

[ ] It's not just a friendship to me, though that's what it seems

[ ] Even if you don't understand

[ ] When I say those words, my heart beats with a love that's silent but real

[ ] So when I say "I love you most," its me telling you how i secretly feel

In a quest to find myself I set out in disguise
I trekked many a winding valley and mountainside
And it was a very many years before I found Myself; at last.
For I was wearing a very good disguise.

Just because you didn't like what i said doesn't make it inherently mean
I will always be the angry Black girl
Unfortunately
I am angry
I am perpetually Black
And a woman beyond my control
But is it wrong to be angry
At a world that doesn't want me
A world that hides me
Tells me
I got that bad hair
Im not good enough for TV
Fix your
Hair
Fix your
Nose
Fix your
Additude
Grown folks business
I am a woman built to mother children
My womb built to harbor
Pray to God they aren't a girl
Pray to God they aren't
Black
I dont have to be angry
Sit back
Let someone else be angry
Let someone else be the Black girl in the room
But my blood won't let me
My veins will jump up and run away
My body's inclined
My soul won't sit
Sit for *******
So I'm forcing myself to bd the angry Black girl

I wake in the middle of the night and there's not enough air to fill my lungs

I can see the calm but it's too far away

There's enough noise in my head to wake the neighborhood

Scream into my pillow, I'm sure it's traumatized by now

Put my headphones on and force myself to sleep

I wake in the middle of the morning it's like it never happened

There's air in the room

My music is louder than the noise

Being sad is only for the dark of my room

My personality isn't fit for depression

I'm not that girl

I have too many hobbies to be so sad so I just decided to stop

Tears are for pillows

Crying is for your bed

Because you're too happy to be sad

It's. Not. You.

these days
i force myself
not to speak
to explain
to justify
my ways
i don't say
how i feel
i try not to
ask questions
what right do i have
to express myself
as a child
with no aims?

I don't wanna be around people I have to explain it too
I wanna be around people who relate
Who get it
The struggle
I want to be around people who know what it's like to get their hair braided
Who knows what it's like when People touch your hair
Who know what it's like to weigh out whether or not you should fight back
Who know what it's like to have to change your vocabulary for someone
Who know what it's like to be the mean girl

Because it is a big deal.

You don't see it because it's not you
You don't see it because it doesn't matter to you
You dont see it because you aren't me

You don't know what it's like to get your hair braided
You don't know how it feels when people toch your hair
You don't know what it's like

For me it's not just touching my hair
It's treating me like I'm some exotic thing
It's making me the me the bad guy for calling you out, because your feelings got hurt
It's making sure not to use slang so I'm not "that kind of black girl"
It's being mean for speaking out

It's being around people who you have to explain this to.

You must leave the nest,

even if you can't fly yet --


then you'll have to hop.

SH stands for so happy
I carve it into my skin because I am so happy
I used to be so happy
All the time
So happy in the morning
So happy at night
So happy with a toilet paper roll over the sink
I loved to be so happy
I'm not so happy anymore
So
Unhappy?
So
Ber.
So this is me now
Not so happy
But I am happy
Just Happy
And JH doesn't stand for anything