my favorite season has arrived.

standing outside in the sunlight,
feeling the cool breeze
   slip through my fingers,
      weave in and out of my hair,
         and twirl me around like the falling leaves.

standing inside in the firelight,
absorbing the smell of the
   cinnamon, and the
      roasted potatoes, and the
         hot chocolate and coffee and tea.

true happiness has taken its place,
and i finally feel the joy.

There becomes a time when you realize that your poetry is better than your fiction
The deaths in your life, sap your creativity.
With all dead friends, what can blossom?
Bad decisions and body parts
Like the flesh from a tree, positivity follows suit
But the arms of which carry you are wrecked
Because they are the arms of the grieved
The beautiful, belligerent, alcohol tolerant lives that you have left behind
There are your friends, that die like a hard rain.
But they are just as refreshing and reflect just as much sunlight.
But they die just the same
Suns die, stars burn out
Just as you realize that the hoped for importance of your writing was never as important as your friend

It was hollow, and blue
with light leaks of black surrounding
circles of sun light, peaking through
to say "Hello", there were too many
I couldn't respond, I could not see you

It was hollow, and blue
strange, I see no light at the end
But I see a mirror, reflecting the past
that stood behind me,
to get through, I must get closer to
the mirror that reflects my past

It was hollow, and blue
with no light leaks of black surrounding
circles of sunlight, peaking through
I still don't have the courage
to get through, to get to you

- Kaya

You were taken from me before we were born
and so I floated and grew alone in a room for two dreaming of moons and sunlight

What are you if you are a twin,
but never had the chance to be one?

I'm half of a whole made up of two people
but now I am  all of what is left,
with a ghost
hidden in my peripherals  

Sometimes I feel I am the moon,
the moon and lunar tides
which means you must've been the sun and shores
to tie me to the earth

Because when I am alone, you are the phantom beside me reminding me of warmth,
and you are the unexplained loss I feel
standing in the sun

Close my eyes.
Try to breathe.
Squeeze them shut harder,
But there's not a color
Darker than black.

Therefore night is as
Dark as
I'm allowed to get.

Leave me breathless,
Or bleeding out,
Either way,
I took the risk,
And here we are.

And I feel like
This could be really good,
If I can just forget everything else.

I feel like
You're all I want.
This love feels like
I could survive
Off a diet
Of crisp fall air,
your love,
And the rush of sunlight.

And jealousy
Can eat away at me,
From time to time.
My sins are greed (for your time) and envy,
I'm so over wrath.

But love me please,
If you'll see it the way I'm seeing it.

I can breathe easy,
Knowing you're mine,
But this love isn't all
Sunshine and roses
(Good thing I hate roses)

It's the weight of my heart
When we're apart.
It's knowing I can bring out the best
In you,
It's knowing who I can be
And exactly who you are,
And seeing the light in your eyes,
And knowing for a fact
That the fire that lays there,
Can burn,
But trusting it enough
To know it won't dare
Lick away at my flesh
Until all that's left is dry bone.

I know that fire that burns in your eyes,
Is the source of the sunlight,
And that it's your kiss
That creates a mock-autumn breeze,
So I can breathe easily.
I know your love
Will carry me into
The only home
I've ever wanted to know.

"I know we're miles apart,
But I'm looking your way."

Three months ago you said I was your sunlight, but today I saw you put your hand over your eyes to block the sun

Sunlight dances on glistening raindrops
Caressing Autumn leaves.
The cold air crisp through my heart of ice  
On this chilly Autumn eve.