I miss: Daytime drinking and Lazy mornings and Student loans and Living with friends and Lecture theatres and Essay deadlines and Empty weekends and Fancy dress and Coffee on campus and Weeknight clubbing and Petty arguments and Academic writing and Walking into town and ****** TV and A queue for the shower and Un-ironed clothes and Library fines and Simpler times.
I am knees deep in a quick sand designed for people like me by a system that thrives on a climate of fear Obtaining knowledge while selling my soul Profit driven suits, splurging words about our rights and our duties Camouflaging their own self-interest Playing monopoly on knowledge Convincing us, that chasing that silly piece of paper is the only option Concealing the true cost that comes with knowledge One most of us will never be able to afford An ocean of debt, one I will surely pay until I'm dead Behold the loophole though, silver spooned fed mouths need not sink nor swim That hollowed shaped silver holding them high above ground While the rest of us sink limb by limb into a quicksand that was designed for people like us
It's 3:43 AM. I can't close my eyes. My hearts beating too loud. My stomach is twisting. I don't want to be anyone's trouble. Will I ever be something? Could I be your honey? Even though, I have no money? I need to work. I'll buy lotto tickets. Do I have to strip? Or do ****? What does it take? My first payment is two-hundred and thirty-six dollars twenty-three cents. It increases after two years. I don't have a job yet- I graduate this May- if I don't die. If I don't die, I will have to pay this November. Our anniversary is in November. Better find a government job. Make that cash! I don't want a sugar daddy with a white mustache. She said, "Everyone has loans." Yeah, but I'm no one. What does it take to get paid loads loads loads of cash? I didn't care for money. Capitalism grants me no choice but to Wonder what it's like at the bottom of the ocean? No structure- it's dark. I'll become fish food, in some rich man's aquarium.
You must register with an employment agency, he said through a muffled yawn, to defer your studnet loan payments for the next six months.
But don't worry, he continued, clearing his throat and sipping what I presumed was stale coffee, you don't have to accept any jobs that you're offered.
