**** you thieving gulls,
bold and noisy bandits of the air
you will not still my thoughts,
I need to sit on a shiny plastic chair
scrape the legs across a bumpy concrete floor,
drink a cup of steaming words,
lose then find myself within the oceans roar,
come foaming water take me
wash my head
fold me and remake me
send me tumbling to the beach
to roll and scrape along the sand
throw my worries out of reach
snack on them for just a little while
swallowed whole by heaving marram grass
trapped within your ever shifting smile

Unsettling feelings settle in,
Distraction without cause.
A million plans of what to do.
Overwhelmed, I pause.

Minutes become hours,
And fast turn into days.
Days drift into many years,
Evidenced by the greys.

Trapped inside this vivid dream,
Broken, Sad, Forlorn.
Finding peace with moonlight's kiss,
Hating hopeless dawn.

'It all gets better in the end',
Simply, I don't buy it.
Stifled deep within my heart,
This haunting disquiet.

From the depth of my cage
I saw you pretending to be
Not my keeper
Releasing me, only to chase me
Into my own nightmare
Of charred souls
Standing helpless
As I watched the ash blow away

so much bad news
to drown in
my wife tells me
to put down
my phone and
play quiet music
but I wonder
if that’s fiddling
while Rome burns,
the ship’s orchestra
playing as the
Titanic sinks or
just good advice
from the one who
knows me best
...cue the music

Aching to sink further into the dirt
Into the grave, you built while pacing back and forth
Manifesting the prophecies you work so hard to avoid
Wrapped up in soiled stories of what could be,

You linger on the branches of a willow’s weep
Swinging from each somber lullaby into feathers that soar
Into the minds covered in clouds resting on the top of the world
Clarity is misguided when there’s more fun to be had amid the fog

Picking at the scab you know will bleed
You crave to reopen the wounds you know not to be ready
Eager for a dance against Time,
He laughs at your foolish attempts to hurry

Under-paid, fed up
Over-worked, had enough
Lotto on, good luck

I have a D+ in chemistry.
I have a D+ in chemistry, despite doing my best work throughout the quarter.
I have a D+ in chemistry, so I hired a tutor.
I have a D+ in chemistry, so I obsessed over it for a while.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but my hard work continues.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but the laughs of me and my friends still fill my school halls.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but my scars remain healed.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but I can still listen to music late at night, while the summer air fills my room through an open window.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but the wind still hits my face when I step outside, lifting my hair from my shoulders, the sun wiping my cheek.
I have a D+ in chemistry, but the moon still shines behind the clouds, reminding me she’s still there.
I have a D+ in chemistry, so I’ll do better.

A heavy weight on your shoulders will only grow heavier.

People around you support you to lift that heavy weight.

When nobody sees that heavy weight you eventually fall down.
The weight will be too heavy to bear.

You have no clue as to what to do.

But in the end you should know.

Your path does not end here.

It is not the end of the world.

Don't be afraid to hug yourself too.

Have you ever come to the end of the day,
and can run the clock back play by play,
and can add it up that supposedly
it was the day it was supposed to be,
but somehow it seems that no time has gone
like a broken record playing on and on,
and you think back through all the things you’ve done -
every day every deed bleeding into one,
and you can’t help but feel just a little fear
and hopelessness, cuz it isn’t clear
what it’s all about, why you rise each day,
fight the fights you fight, play the games you play,
do the things you do, “Just what the hell for”
for you’ve done it all a thousand times before,
and could keep on going til the bitter end,
and perhaps you will but what purpose then
does it serve, and so your left with not
but to sigh and deal with what you’ve got,
and just keep moving for you know what they say…
 
Tomorrow will be a bran new day.