spark*
t h e
f
l
a
m
e

and

i                                      
n                              
h                      
a            
l      
e
the essence

e   x   p   e   l

a l l    t o x i n s
a n d   t h a t   w h i c h
n o   l o n g e r
s e r v e s   y o u

I think this is what it is, something short yet bright in my chest. Too quick to be named, yet felt with my entire being. It thrums inside of my heart, natural as sunlight through window curtains, as secretive and cheeky as a grin. This is one of the types of happiness I know.

The quick ones that make you feel you are on top of the world, despite the state of everything which says otherwise.

It is but a spark.

Gaze full of hurt
Prophecy now unclear
Terrified of breaking you
More than I appear

I may seem composed
Unbothered to the untrained eye
It's destroying me within, believe
To be the one saying goodbye

I never played the field
Not used to being the one
Who steals hearts, smashes them
As soon as they stop having fun

I see shapes through loves blindfold
The sharpness of your rotten core
I am deciding loneliness
Is better than our hearts raw and sore

I know demeanor is cold
On a leash keep emotions felt
Shallow breath gives away
That my adoration is starting to melt

When calamity ultimately manifests
Into a mess you'd rather hide
Disruptive indiscretions occur
Bruises are born inside

A different suffering spreads
Polluting narrow veins
Morphing my blood dark and slow-moving
Spiraling down my arm red drains

I wish I could resuscitate the spark
Then I wouldn't feel so guilty and bad
It doesn't matter how we got here
What matters is that we can't go back