I reach out, begging,
waiting as I hold my breath,
hoping for the waves to return,
to stretch out,
to splash against my sand-coated feet.
Staring out at the ocean,
I wish.
I dream.
I pray.
But somewhere in my mind,
I have long since given up.
Call it selfishness,
call it greed.
Never will the ocean touch my flesh,
but I still crave to hold the salty water
up to my dry, cracked lips,
embracing its sting,
crying out for the sweetness
you and I long lost.

Headstrong, yet bitten by the snake of narcotic charm...
As the venom flows, your dreams slowly begin to die
The goals, the passions, the visions begin to change
The personalty of the passionate man turns to selfishness
The confidence turns to self pity from the demon within
What was, what is and what will be, turns to nothing
The morals turn to lies, the caring turns to taking
This narcotic charm transfers itself to a necrotic death
Your family, your friends, your love, have slowly given up
You've hit rock bottom and still look for the snake's charm
It has been your pet for so long and you can't let it go
Your only have two choices, to slither in it's hole and die
The second is the *most important decision of your life

Pulled apart at the seams
I'm trying to cut you out
like I should have long ago
when the signs were clear
but what does that mean to the blind

I never thought I asked for much
just that you'd
live long and die for me
as I'd do for you
now I'm drowning in your discontent

pulled under by your ignorance of
my suffering
sinking down at least I
tried
what else could you have wanted

now I'm just another stone in the sand
at the bottom

It is selfish but
we long for stability.
Someday, we will die.

© Matthew Harlovic

All are doomed to love.
All are doomed to die.
Tonight bring the black tomb.
For even the most high.
Even those in this room.
Cannot pretend to fly
And I know.
Even you.
Even I.
Must die.

What is within your reach
Is in the soil beneath your feet
Or the tear on someone’s face
These things that you can touch
And nourish with your care
Can also be made to feel pain
If you think not of their very nature
But only what you would have them be

What you can only see
But not dig with a *****
Or wipe with your fingers
These things you cannot touch
That revolve all around us
Silently comforting us
Without our demands upon them
To be what we would have them be

What you chose to leave behind
Did you know what it was when you met?
Did you know what it was going to be?
Did you know the distance already traveled?
Was its promise too slow to grow?
Was it already planted when you found it?
Did you dig it up and **** its essence,
To be what you would have them be?

What you know now
Is the same that you knew then
The things you can touch
And the things you can only see
Haven’t changed though you have
But what will you do now?
Will you make them like you?
Or let them be what they must be?

This isn't a poem really.
More like a statement,
multiple questions of curiosity.

Is there really a heaven up above?
Above the clouds and the sky?
Is there really a place we go to when we die?
Or are we just simply put in a casket and left to rot?

Who remembers us when we are gone?
Our families?
Those who originally said they don't care?

Who visits us when we are dead?
Who comes by our graves and lays down a bouquet of roses or flowers?
Who says,
" I regret never telling them I love them?"
Because when I die, I don't just simply want a funeral and a burial.
I want someone to ball their eyes out, and for someone to whisper,
"I never got to tell her...I never told her how much I loved and wanted her. And now I never will have that chance."
Call me selfish. I dont care.
But is it too much to ask for someone to mend my broken heart, so that I may yet learn to love again?

As we all have someone in our lifes we love or hate... vengeance is bittersweet. Id love to go bust down the door of her house. And not **** her, but her family... to hurt her soul, like shes done mine. Have her stand there alone with nothing left but emptiness... but I cant. It would destroy me,  take my "heaven". **** maybe hell wouldnt be so bad if I got in with the right people. But im scared. I love life and my biggest fear is death. For a man with nothing, I feel I have the most to lose... myself in bitter sweet nothingness...