The night is drawing to a close
And the stars are slowly fading
Like a frame of negative that hasn’t been developed
Both are erasing by the light
But I have this picture in my mind
And the stars will appear again
On the sky or somewhere
Nobody knows yet.

Heavy clouds has covered the firmament
I am looking for some bright spot on it
There’s nothing, what a disappointment
It’s time for developing my images
Safely stored inside my heart
As a writer starts typing his new pages
A delicious story, passionate, smart
Am I ready yet?

I am blind in a dark room
That I've built to bring my pictures to life
To look at my stars, the pictures I have took  
And I almost lost, foolish, too brave
But the seeds of light will appear soon,
They’r going to assemble my images in while
I can't wait to see them, how do they look
Now or not yet?

The small miracle of creation has begun
I see my constellations again
Even though the sky is cloudy
Look there, at your skin
Thousand stars cover thy shoulders
Let me discover more of them
I will find small cosmos on your body
It has to be done yet.

There’s no time to be late
Before cold reason defeats my burning desire
And like a black hole destroys all the space
I won’t lost it on my discovering race
Lots of frames I have to collect still
And I am afraid, that my film negative will expire
Please believe in my observing skill
I can’t let thou go, not yet.

Winter nights are pushing us
out of our comfort zones:
warm hearts, heated rooms.
I abandoned both,
I am walking alone through dark streets,
the cold goes into my bones.

Uncounted billions of stars guide me on my paths.
Those silent companions, caught in time,
have been trembling in the deep space since eternity.
I am looking for my ancient gods,
those I chased away by my lechery.
It was my biggest crime.

So I am desolate now, then,
suffering for my sins in an endless reality.
This night is never going to its end.
I’v been frozen in time space since I don’t know when.
There is no young prince whom rescues me by his kiss.
All of them are avoiding my personality.

I'm cold, I'm on my knees with silent pray.
My dark heart beats slowly
as snow flakes are falling from the sky.
But only my demons are listening to my rogations,
they follow me on my desperate way.
I am too weak for any negations.

Even the street lights get dark.
The fear forces them to hide the street in the cloak of night,
to avoid this strange black suite.
Stars are only lighting the firmament, far away in safety space.
The darkness has swallowed everything
No one can see my crooked face.

I'm sitting tired on the tombstone
of my ancient god’s grave.
No man, this empty grave is mine.
I buried my heart there.
But the light of hope peeks from afar,
I still should be saved, come on!
Return to me and bring me the light my Apollon.

in between downward dogs,
my phone buzzes —
again.
and again.

for fifteen whole minutes,
i leave you unread.

you’re drunk, smitten,
with someone i know,
someone you spotted
at a gig.

you send a live-feed
of your spiralling heart,
ask what to say,
if the moment does come.

i tell you to try.
say hi for me.
talk about music,
the crowd, the energy,
the way the incandescence,
blurry but kind,
makes them look soft
in that lavender light.

and you do.
of course you do.
you take a leap of faith,
while i sit here
in silence,
finding a hundred ways
to rehearse what my heart would
but my mouth will never say.

I’ve got a paper heart and a rock hard brain
It’s hard as any stone; harder that any pain
Now, my paper heart; it bleeds quite well
Look through my eyes and you can surely tell

Love is a tragedy; it’s all systems fail
All that’s good and right, all that’s what the hell
Paper hearts can’t crush a mind of stone
Paper hearts, they only cry when they’re alone

The paper folds quite easily; in the creases you will see
All there is to find and all there will ever be
Solid ground is where you like to run around
And here you are in the lost and found

Paper hearts and rock hard brains
Harder that the hardest pains
Paper hearts with your creases deep
Which of my secrets will you forever keep

I love you.
You love me.
So why does silence
stand between us
like a wall neither of us dares to touch?

Why can't we say it—
out loud,
clear,
honest?

Is it fear?
Timing?
Or the quiet belief
that if we speak it,
we might lose
what we're too afraid to reach for?

We carry love
like a secret
burning quietly
beneath the surface.

You wanted me quiet-
A flicker in the dark,
Something trilling
You wanted a spark

I was your secret,
Easier to keep alone
Because secrets rots,
When kept for too long

You wanted my all, my devotion
You paced around it, like a dare
Like a truth, not to be shared

You don't think I feel,
But it's all I felt
Yet I stayed silent,
I am my own personal hell

I self sabotage
Knowing you wouldn't care
I didn't not want you,
You just wanted-
What can never be fully touched

Never to be fixed,
And never undone.

Let this poem be a joke
Filled with mischief and racoons
Giggles in the dark
Catching their breath like twin butterflies
Under the moon

As I lean my head on your shoulder
And whisper silly wisdoms
Into your ear
I almost believe myself
To be capable of
Something like nonchalance
But I never am.

Serenity is a wave reaching shore
In the moments I accept
That you are a secret
I will never solve completely
And that is alright.

With sea-sand between my teeth
I mumble your name
And lay it in the waves
Latch it onto water-drops
For another one to taste.

Mine is
Peace once again

You looked at him...
Is the way I wished you'd see me,
yet I stood still for a silent memory.

Each step your took...
So my heart withdrew,
Fo I watching you love him,
the way I love you.