you sit and pout
about everything
try to work out your problems
by finding ways around them
but that is not the way life goes.
you're slowly running out of time
without realizing it
you're stuck in your head again
you feel like it's too hard to get out
but this isn't you
i know me and you aren't acting quite like her
this isn't you and you know it
but i know you don't know much about yourself
been too busy absorbing the personalities that surround you
you're slowly losing yourself
without realizing it
you're going too black out one of these days,
they say
and those words aren't wrong
they might foreshadow destiny
but only you can stop them
only you can put an end to the words that they tell you
you can either choose to ignore them or consume them
but you better choose
you better choose by not what you feel but by what you believe is enough.
you've got to keep going,
even when everything feels like it isn't worth it.
you over analyze everything,
try taking a step back
every once in a while
cause' only you have the ability to turn wrongs to rights

Someone loves you
sOmeone loves you
soMeone loves you
somEone loves you
someOne loves you
someoNe loves you
someonE loves you

There was a sign; my body felt it.
I know that it says something.
But I don't know what that means.

I don't know where to go.
I cannot know it.

But I know that I need to stand up now.
It is certain.

And I know that another sign will come.
So that I can approach more to somewhere.

Yes, I know that, as I have known it.

Wanted:

A permanent partner, a fast friend,
A heartbreaking Harlow, a mystifying muse,
A goth girl, a Southern seductress

Must be:
     Someone who will call me up & call me
     out
     Someone who wakes my senses and keeps
     me in bed
     Someone strong enough to show me her
     faults and weak enough to cave to my
     cravings of
          intimacy in caffeine-driven crescendos
          of stimulating company & conversation
          as well as the spontaneous shenanigans
          of improvised encounters
     Someone to sow the seeds of new love in
     the furrowed field left by Life's scarring
     upon my heart.

I can’t imagine myself without my longing
call it infatuation or blind optimism
while my suitors may have changed, this feeling seems to follow me through the milestones
find me in the dead of night, breaking my own heart
searching for a hero

For Sara.

You've lost all you've caught.
& what you've got is not your senses.
Not your lights.
Not your couch.
Not your fences.
Written on your face.
Says all is nothing.
& tasteless.
What's it to grace.
& hope.
When your atoms greet the pavement.
From a thousand feet up.




Garrett Johnson.