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trixmilk Jun 2020
i’m wasting all your ****
because every time you get high
i blow you like ****
if i bit the tip off
blood stained teeth look so bad
because the braces off
gum problems grinding teeth
crunching on pearls having dreams
of pearly whites falling out like
chuck e. cheese token
wake up startled and you’re not next to me
panic attack paranoia at 3 a.m.
witching hour demon watching through
the window
i am not safe from cherry eyes with the
lamp on because they can see me
staring through the window
spazz out to realization
what’s behind the woods
i take a pretty pill and slither out the window
while laying in my bed
pillow texture heavy but pitter patter crunch grass therapeutic
soar through fence, float over trees
come to the spot
by the lake we sat at on easter
i want to go back to summer
i want to go back to spring
i want to go back to winter
when we were shy for each other
now i can’t look you in the eyes
without twists of guilt and adoration
because we argue too much
i don’t even know how to cry
while you fill up the lake
big brash geese flop down into
this pool of your tears
i brush my hand against your shoulder
to comfort you but you shudder away
from me
like i’m a ghost’s breeze
my heart dips its head and goes
downstairs for a snack
water dispenser don’t work
so my mouth’s dry with toasted air
strained lungs can’t cough up words to say
knowing how to comfort you is a skill i forgot
all i can repeat is i love you
you sob at the side of your house as i flutter to you
butterfly butterfingers
as you slip out of my touch
i’m getting so distant
because the tide is pulling me back
let me say i love you baby
you say “i know you do”
i retract back to my bed
no night’s sleep stuck in a trip
doxycycline ***** cycle
you witnessed eight times
in one night
and you comforted me
i miss when we took care of each other
cycling through our memories
i want to pedal to you
but i don’t know how to ride a bike
told your pappy i ran over my mom with
purple disney princess bike when i was six
you let me in your home
built up on swiss cheese drywall
basically an old married couple at sixteen
waking up in (y)our bed together
naked planning for our baby in ten years
please let me cross this imaginary line
and run into your arms
our bodies were crafted from fire and amniotic fluid for the sheer purpose
of holding each other
the nook of your neck and shoulder
and the cranny of my hips
we come together like puzzle pieces
please don’t swipe me off the table
i want to fit with you
trixmilk Jun 2020
i take a stroll through a concrete fuzz of grey and gray
it seems so surreal to me to even breathe
i live in a dream where my feet move themselves
as my arms clench onto the bed
grasping sheets that protect me from no ghosts
no shadow people or monsters
because they crawl under them when i cry myself to sleep
i see so many faces
morphing changing
man to woman to someone
i fear recognition
i fear being nobody
the breeze is only temperature
pressure is an illusion
little children prancing through the mildew grass
what is green grass and
what are blue skies
what are happy smiles
when i'm not even frightened to die
spiraling in and out of control
i am a video edited
by my drugs
they insert transitions into my existence
fade effects and pretty overlays
i crave them like candy store kids
i envy them
i want to wear their shell
and experience their lust for growing old
so that i can reverse it
and back this car up into the walgreens
and stumble out with opal eyes
wider than how i spread my thighs
for personalities that are not mine
i want to french kiss a gun
and pull the bullets out with my tongue
and tie the metal into cherry knots
i want to see all the colors
and feel all the love for myself
that i don't have sober
i yearn to create solutions for all my mistakes
and accept that they got me to where i am now
keep pushing
so that the rest of my body moves with my feet
and my soul no longer stays in place
Samara Jun 2020
fireflies
wild flowers
growing in the rough

let them grow
where they go
thriving sure enough
Lara May 2020
Emotions
You can’t control them

Some people are able to show their emotions
Some people prefer to not share them

Emotions are private
Everybody decides who they want to share their emotions with

Emotions are a way to express feelings

Emotions can be rough or sensitive

They sometimes drown you
You decide whether to swim back to the surface or go under the wave and become a part of the ocean
Can you control them?
nick armbrister May 2020
Bar Steward Town 8
Do you satisfy your wife?
Let me do that to her

Things like that happen here
Nobody thought odd of it

Not even to the ****** couple bonking
In the school yard after hours

All the town's folk were this way
Thirsty and drinkers all the time

It was sort of local pride
Just like nailing a hole

Lots of ***** warm beer
And skanky holes

That type of town
Awesome people
CC 191 2020
JIMMY BOOM SEMTEX
Mish Apr 2020
you told me i was a priority
i guess you lied to me
why did i come twelfth?
Kvothe Apr 2020
Delirious morn
Scornful of the rising sun
Someone, water, please
دema flutter Apr 2020
i thank the hardships,
that life made you go through,
for the roughness
of the skin that lies
on the palm of
your hands,

because that's the only
part of you i can still
feel
in my dreams
dear grandpa, i miss you
Poetic T Apr 2020
I'm no trailer park trash,
you may live
                      forty three stories more than me..

But I'll reach higher than you any day of the week.

I only have to take one step,
                             to tell what is
                        curb crawling around me.

Trying to sell me false hopes,
            selling me bath salt dreams.

But there more like bubble bath,
          popping before I even enjoyed it.

Your hopes and dreams are sky high,
illusions of
           your first steps.
A worthless dime falling from  a great height.


              No one even heard you
                                           plunge...

Cos there only interested what's
                                      happening on the street..

Your just a stain that no one really looked at,

                                                        cares about.


    As there's plenty more chalk outlines
                            that children hopscotch over..

Can you count to ten..


Then there's another gunshot..
          like a storm, they hitting in the distance..

Just another cold breath that falls from ground zero...
                                                  burn stains on the
side-lines
                    that play pause.



                                        No breath... no care.

I'm here at ground zero,
            your up there in your fairy-tale

hanging from your chandelier,

But I'm swinging lower but still breathing.
Styles Mar 2020
When I touch you
I feel you
in a way
that touches me.
When they reach for you
they barely grasp you
and still you
let them *******.

*******.
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