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JJ Elias Jun 2014
Living is often like drowning, and sleeping like flying,
So bridges and tall buildings always tempt me.
When I talk about death I feel brave.
I've always hated how recognition can so easily turn into pride.
They say pride comes before the fall,
But I believe that various kinds of self-centeredness are the origin of all unholy descents.
I remind myself that I shouldn't take my life because I didn't give it,
And my heart continues to beat on its own.
Blood doesn't stain crimson red,
It darkens and crusts on the skin.
Everything that is dead becomes only a memory,
Then it disintegrates and washes away, eventually becoming nothing.
I can’t remember anything from before I had the ability to reason,
So when did I come alive?
I wonder if all people valued beauty,
Would there be peace?
Because I sometimes wonder whether Neil Armstrong meant to say what he did as took his first step on the moon.
I think trying is as valuable as doing,
But justification is a dangerous tool.
I am cautious of failure and success;
But count this as my eulogy
A list of things that I am going to say before my untimely death.
*I recognized the world for the canvas it was and I didn't waste my life.
My dreams were my motivation,
And they were fueled by those that underestimated me
I walked streets day and night and prayed that I would somehow run into the girl of my dreams,
and when I finally found my missing rib I looked at her like she was a piece of art that I just couldn't keep my eyes off of.
I suffered and I found its nectar bitter-sweet.
I didn't get the best of life, but then I made the best of life.
I never stopped caring,
my love for the unlovable made me daring.
I trusted too easily so I was always broken.
I always found things to love, but they never loved me,
But despite it, I still loved, hard, even though it hurt me.
I couldn't comfort because I had never been comforted.
After a lifetime of battling myself, I finally took off my crown of thorns.
I didn't let the past get the best of me,
I gave the future all of me.
I hated animosity,
War was despicable to me,
And I always preached peace.
I prayed constantly that my efforts would not be in vain.
I never actually could stop sinning,  but despite my ugly sins, I never stopped straining.
I was not perfect, but I did the best I could.
I never ceased to hear the music.
I still played, even when I felt like I was playing solo, I still played my part in this symphony of life.
My eyes were aimed at the director, and we played through the storm,
We played even when all hell was against us,
We played, and played, and played
Until eternity came through.....
The letters are aligned for you; stay
Drumming force of an army, and thousands of soldiers yet to come
Sleep, come my way

I dread the night and the brainwork that trails
Dark heartfelt burn by each passing day
Destined to lonely confinement
Contained
Cared for and then disdained

“Beware! despairing hope, the birth of a thought!”
Full moon, pale old rock, no cause for delight
a shimmering light that of silver, soldiers at the gates!
I descended, opened the gates
now stay

O the heart, heart knows no retreat
Misplaced, has it not been the case?
Prisoned in a dying body; a cave
Sentenced to expectancies; decay

Undead
occupied at last, toasting red wine
“Never been more alive” a lie
Cure the heart with reason
revolt! shake off this helplessness
all I see is the science behind beauty and her forgetful nature
I remembered the nameless shadows they were once close at bay; treason

And he, the lingering shadow of doubt, romanticized pain. an addiction, lack of shame

While she, cloud-footed and unaware, left to become a nameless ghost
Ashleigh Black May 2014
Everyone’s always saying that
you shouldn’t romanticize sadness
but you know, it’s actually quite beautiful
to witness someone’s ability
to withstand the pain
that they deal with and I think
that should be celebrated.
Just my opinion.

— The End —