Evacuate the cockpit,
Give me the joystick,
I am the one in control.

Enough of your decisions,
Enjoy my dominion,
This is what you deserve.

You don’t need to speak,
Go join with the weak,
I am not listening.

Don’t give me your emotion,
My plan is in motion,
There is nothing you can do.

How does it feel?
Your fate is sealed.
Helpless just like me.

See, I am weakest upon this ship,
My esteem drains drip by drip.
But you don’t know that.
Because I am in control.

Divide and conquer,
Narcissistic, off my rocker,
I am your ruler now.

Don’t look me in the eye,
Shut up and stand in line,
I. Am in. Control.

I don’t care if you think you can save me
I don’t care if you think you have the right to change me
I don’t care if you think I’m scary or crazy or whatever
I don’t care if you think I’m someone for you to change, to control
You don’t get to come for me
Don’t try to come for me
Don’t even think about coming for me
Don’t you come for me ever.

I don’t care if your circuits are blown by being in my presence
I don’t care if your friends are coming for you over what I am
I don’t care if your hormones are raging out of control
I don’t care if your systems are screaming in a desperate need to lash out
You don’t get to come for me
Don’t try to come for me
Don’t even think about coming for me
Don’t you come for me ever.

Do you understand now that not everything is about you
Do you understand now that you don’t get to run me
Do you understand now that I’m no toy for you to play around with
Do you understand now that causing strife by minding my business helps no one
You don’t get to come for me
Don’t try to come for me
Don’t even think about coming for me
Don’t you come for me ever.

My soul came back, quick like lightning,
and it's arrival was not welcome.
Sporting a fresh crack under whitening,
bound with a fate to always be numb.
Everyone desperately craves originality,
but they don't realize the isolation.
There doesn't seem to be a solid home for me,
amongst this dust and desolation.

Horror of hollow, living on the brink of life.
Tomorrow I'll swallow my words that cut like a knife.
I'll document the destruction and bring it to light,
I hope the eruption satisfies your appetite.

The walls were tainted with love struck scribbles,
written in every colour of the rainbow,
so we painted but there still were dribbles,
I slept in a made bed and always reap what I sow.
What does it matter if it's in the past?
There's no reasons that I've found.
But I see a pattern of what doesn't last
and you know lately I'm always down.

You went to rub salt in my wound
I told you that I've had my fill.
You informed me the world was doomed,
and you were looking forward to the thrill.

Horror of hollow, living on the brink of life.
Borrow and follow the world's sense of strife.
I'll document the destruction and bring it to light,
just because that's how you feel it doesn't make it right.

I never knew much about other souls,
until I watched one fall apart,
crumbling from all the cracks and holes,
stemming out from a broken heart.
I was never fluent in social clues,
the ones that tell you what you want to hear,
instead I'd sit silent ready to lose,
what I loved all due to fear.

Horror of hollow, living on the brink of life.
Explorer of wallow, bestfriend and a wife.
I'll document the destruction and bring it to light,
I'll underline the tragedy and italicize my might.
I'll document the destruction and bring it to light,
but how will anyone know if it never makes it into sight?

I know I've been a ***** lately
And you're definitely not used to that
And even if I'm angry at you
I know you don't deserve it

You told me not to push you away
Because I'd rather get wasted than tell you how I feel
Because this **** is killing me
But if I tell you that
Nothing will change

So why would I tell you that this is the most pain I've ever felt?
Why would I tell you how much I hate this whole thing?
Why would I say that I'm fighting all my instincts to run?
Because you know I won't
Because I love you
And leaving would hurt just as bad as this

And why would I tell you I don't want you to have a third partner?
Although you kind of already do
And even staining those words on this screen
Makes me want to ******* die

We're supposed to work through ****
But what if I can't?
I know we've all felt this way
But we are not the same
You and they cried about it
So did I
A few times
But now I'm just angry and resentful
And I feel nothing aside from that
Except the urge to hurt myself

Why would I tell you that hanging out doesn't help me?
It really doesn't change anything
Because even when we're together
I accidentally see her name across your phone screen
You mention her in a story
And my insides implode and I
Immediately
Wanted
to leave

But we were in a group
And I didn't want to answer any questions
Because these thoughts feel juvenile
And my aggression that's normally hidden
Tucked deep inside where no one else can see it
Is starting to break free
And I don't know what that means

When I'm at work I want to die
But when I go home I feel the exact same
And if you had came over today
I knew it was out of pity
And I don't need that ****
You cannot fix me
Nothing helps this

I feel ******* useless
I feel replaceable
I feel angry and aggressive (because I am)
And I feel invisible
I feel like I don't matter at all
And what I feel means absolutely nothing
Because you'll do whatever you want
And even though I say that's fine
I'm ******* suffocating
And I really don't know if I can hold my breathe much longer
Before I lose myself
And leave

Dreams of dawn keep waking me,
I'm going on another spree,
of taking a path that's not worn down,
I've been faking the math and turning it around.

I don't want to go, but I know, that life is so.
I don't want to go, with the flow, they move too slow.

Dreams of dawn keep waking me,
with a yawn and shaking constantly.
Feeling ill and dreading the sun,
so I'll take a pill but it's not the only one.

I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, the wind's can blow, I'll hide from the snow.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want go, I'm feeling low, I'm no swan but a crow.

Dreams of dawn are waking me,
I'll be a pawn along with society.
Too much work for too little of pay,
my knees will **** but my feet will stay.

I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, I'll never grow, if this world's a foe.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, march in a row, and feel the tow.
I don't want to go, but I know, life is so.
I don't want to go, don't make me, no, there won't be a show.

I hate  you
I love you
Maybe it’s not good enough to be true.
I know enough
With the waters this rough.
I’m just not happy like I used to
Mad and angry resentful and sappy.
I’m tired of caring, pouring my heart,
It’s bleeding.
The ****** of blood from my wrists
Drip down my arm
And kids ?
The moral of the story is not to be told
But experienced and forever alone.