Been thinking...
It's about time I made some changes...

Came so far now and I feel free
So free, 9 to 5 stress, call in green delivery
But eventually problems set in, it's only Monday
Loved as one, feel so gone and my future looks ugly
Jurry and executioner, can you please judge me
Money and pain go down the drain, and it's getting harder for me
Creating issues from problem solutions, still act toughie
Don't try to rush me
Midnight-mares ride through the night, it's scary
And "all this time I couldn't see
How could this be
That the curtain is closing on me"
Emin- NFing music discovery
Drop these drugs down the drain, head to rehab recovery
Problem facing, defacing, move to different countries
Running a race but never winning cos running from you is destroying me
Blowing smoke 24/7, this can't good for me
Keep on rolling sticky green, I'm in 3 deep
My complicated encampment, you see
You know I'm doing my best but does he?
Yeah...
It's hard for me to ask this
When I don't even have a mattress
Used excuses to delete this stress
I may changed ******* nothing, at least I can confess
It's been 15 years and I'm still a ******* mess

I apologise for all the lies
Decite it spreads like fire
My future could've burned so bright
Now I'm stationary, grips me like a vice
But lost my touch and I'm colder than ice
I stopped giving a **** just me, myself and I
But maybe that's just life
Do I dare ask why?

I was the butterfly, who had spread his wings to fly
Barely left the leaf only to be shot down, fall and die
Countless nights that I counted, where these issues filled my eyes
I can't help it, it's how I was raised by life
Now I'm going to go far to both yours and mine surprises
Chasing dreams all despite this,
Dripping in Bape and gold chains
Changing myself just to stay the ******* same
You know I never thought life was great
But **** if she's complainin'...
But **** if I'm staying...
But **** it I think I'm going insane
But **** if this is direction I decide to go...
And I know
Just how to create a flow
So why should I loose it if I know
Is it a gift or is it curse only time will show
Death: it'll set you free and let you go
Eventually it'll catchup to us both
So I'm leaving off this verse
In the back of a Herse
But in the end it was myself I hurt...
Fresh start?
Eye of Horus...
Thought not...
of course...
"Is he getting old"...
"Does he bore us?"...
Enough rhymes for a lifetime
Check my inventory
You know how I'm going out
Blaze of glory...
Well I'm back...
End of story...

I apologise for all the lies
Decite it spreads like fire
My future could've burned so bright
Pen to the pad, I'm stationary, grips me like a vice
But lost my touch and I'm colder than ice
I stopped giving a **** just me, myself and I
But maybe that's just life
Do I dare ask why?
I don't know... but I'll try

I wish I could just hide
Hold up, seek out, try and find
A reason to live or fall into a nose dive
I know your mad boy but just try to imagine
All and everything you hated disappears like magic
Thinking about a world lacking in your apparatus
Tools you use so you can't forget about us
So as a brother in arms
Nicotine to keep your nerves calm
Maybe you think your living in hell, but let me ask
If this world is like hell why are you up in the clouds...

Open mouth, keep it shut and listen to what I have to say
I know there's a quick way to end all this pain
Tack up, stirrups and saddles and just run away
Theres no way to let go when everything stays the same
And no matters how hard you try its impossible to change
Listen and read me and take note as a put this pen to the page
But take what I say with a grain of salt
I know how you feel but Its not my fault
We're like earthquakes because with live our faults
And it just so happens that
You feel like a unnatural disaster
So go on my son, I smoke like a rasta
But that's what it takes to make the horses run faster...

Now I just need to know
Why do you feel so cold
Emotionally so broke
Frozen to death in a war zone
Am I on the right path or the wrong road
Wrong way, it's not to you
Listen to them, no **** you shouldn't
Let them chat **** but I wouldn't
At least you have a family, I couldn't
So if you feel it again just push through it
Some of us just skim through it
Some of us just turn music
I'm a young boy with a gift and I use it
You have a brain well just ******* use it
You'll go far and I know it
If you have a dream pursue it
You corked up your talents so just unscrew it
Listen just think through it
Differently view it
Don't be misconstrued
If you feel depression just subdue it
I know it's confusin'
And it's hard to believe
But I've left footstep so just follow me
Give it some time and you'll see
And always remember
We love you January...