I'm forever chained to my own self which feels like a dark cave
My heart feels so strained As well as my brain
My clarity has been drained
Will I ever stop choking on my thoughts
I wanna blow my ******* brains and get out before I turn into level infinity insane
I can barely walk without my tummy turning into knots  
My stomach is full with my thoughts
My heart is beating but I can’t hear it over my internal screaming
Losing sleep thinking about if my life has meaning
I don’t wanna go back to reality *** my reality is not pleasing it’s just a lot of ******* and people talking with such lack of meaning
Like shut up I am screaming
I know you can’t hear the demons
But look past my eyes and and see me dreaming
Dreaming of such a happy little sober life
I know if I blink twice it will happen right?
Or will the fight just cause me to lose my battle tonight?
My heart feels so strained as well as my brain
My clarity has been drained
Wanna dip out my brain and stop this ******* pain I can’t deal anymore Heart feels so sore
Body feels so sick
Please ******* you evil little ***** tryna target at my mind all of you stole my shine
I used to feel so bright  
I used to love to write
But my energy has been turned off like a light
barley sleep at night
But when I close my eyes I see loud sounds pounding in my foggy sight
Never dreamed of wanting to die but tonight it got too much and my feelings welled up inside causing me to pick up the pad and write
I don’t know what will happen to me
But i guess we’ll see I’ll just keep writing poetry

They think, good golly gosh, I feel the way you move
Live a bit, no fear, and gyrate those hips real smooth
We all know your hip is deep inside and still alive
So show us now, how those legs dance to the groove
‘Cos we know you, know you, know you into groove
And, like duh, UR, UR, You are so dope
We, want you, want you, want you to feel alive
So now we gather, then cheer and feel your jive, watching you groove

So they say
Groove for you
Groove for you
Groove for you Now Now Now
I've always knew that you’ve done this groove years before

We say
Live for you
Live for you
Live for you Yo Yo Yo
And when you're alive, you’ll always feel everything real smooth

I think, good golly gosh, I feel I’m waking up
Take a breath, no fear, and show everyone, whassup
Like mother said, I've been grooving inside far too long
I’ll show you now, how these legs dance to the groove
‘Cos we know you, know you, know you into groove
And, Like duh, UR, UR, You are so dope
We, want you, want you, want you to feel alive        
So now we gather, then cheer and feel your jive, watching you groove

So they say
Groove for you
Groove for you
Groove for you Now Now Now
I've always thought that you’ve done this groove years before

We say
Live for you
Live for you
Live for you Yo Yo Yo
And when you're alive, you’ll never feel anything so smooth

So they say
Groove for you
Groove for you
Groove for you Now Now Now
I've always thought that you’ve done this groove years before
We say
Live for you
Live for you
Live for you Yo Yo Yo

Penny got married young, she idolised her new man  
Penny turned 16, said, I do I do, priest wed them both  
Penny was happy, never complained to anyone, too shy for that  
She crashed a party once, and met a gal named Sally  
They became friends  
And she confided in her  
 
Shared little secrets, lips sealed, shook their little pinkies, never to tell  
Then hubby walked in with curious smile, said you going to stay awhile  
I'm not coming back until sunlight, best thing Penny had heard all night  
‘Cause her new beau, wasn’t all that he seemed  
But only Penny knows so go go go oh no go  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle-up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
 
Penny started staying inside, never going past the front gate  
Some friends called saying you ok you ok you ok girlfriend  
Penny searched websites, looking for a way out, deleting history, nobody got suspicious  
While trying to play the good wife, reality started to sink in  
Then she thought  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
 
And I don't want anyone knowing about the abuse, just in case  
I've covered up since day one, swollen face  
A nightmare, ever since our honeymoon  
Childhood dreams were locked in a cell, but kept them alive and still didn’t tell, even while being slammed unconscious  
It's like my security blanket, it's the reason that I'm alive  
Everyone has childhood dreams, but most will never survive  
They don’t always come true, maybe one out of five, be wise  
Believing Hollywood tabloids, that they are still very much together, all lies  
So go about your ways, put up with the one, that doesn’t love you anymore and continually hurts us and says sorry, again  
Always just after they have, again bruised us  
Forgetting about the pain and coverups that were made  
Thinking it was just a sleeping nightmare, oh no  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
Go now, Go now  
 
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Penny get away, far away, go, Penny go  
Feel you hurting beneath, when we cuddle up  
Fooling some, but mommy sees past that makeup  
Go now, Go now

Whatever you write, make it memorable.
Just as memorable as Ivan the Terrible.
No need to be incredible
Just make those words indelible
From that mind of yours
And also theirs of course.

I used to think that rap
Was not very good.
Haha.
But now I see
Those rhymes so right for me,
And even raps that scan.
Yeah Man!

There’s always time
For a rhyme
Sublime.
Just let them chime.

These rhymes they staple things to your brain
To help you remember every refrain.
Things passed on by word of mouth
From Arctic regions right down to The South.

Remember, remember
That month of November.
Something that sticks
With each dying ember.

Keep aware of the power of words,
As musical as a flock of birds.
Do give in to the urge to write,
To make our day so gloriously bright.

Paul Butters

© PB 13\1\2020 (2). From jottings of 7\1.

Battle for a rap name, rap game
Mixing a reputation of good and bad for fame
What a shame you lost a battle, so tamed
To even push on a young **** so flamed
Unending rhymes for times, it blinds, a crime,
You climb to the nearest mountain being 4'5
You're a legend, you can fly and make fights
Fist punches, clipped guns and street knives
Pick a weapon for your own rights
This is a street not a highway cliff
It's a deadly game as words rift,
Took itself above and land as a meteor from feets
And it  reached heads, unstitched and red
Bleeding from blows received on your neck
Tough life while bloodshed and doom
Featuring guns and grenades saying boom
A mind's zoom can see a zoo,
"Animals" fighting something for no clue
On why the importance is so true
5 tries, like Russian roulette you may get it too
If you stay at night, in a court's fight
You'd lose sight, your might, and get a bite
From hounds trying to act like those in Lord of the Flies
Blinked skies, tripped lights, their street knives are everywhere
Try to look right there, corruption and no shares
Heck my 4 siblings can't bare, a bread this little
They forgot who were us by just a riddle
From our own "apparent dad" and you see small kiddos
Suffering from shadows, they're scared of dark shadows
I want this to be over, for everyone's window are locked
No one can help the real victims cause they're mocked
No one can hide street knives cause they're rocks
And no one expect from their unexpected aftershocks.

Verse 1:
Our eyes meet
Feel the heat
Have to take a seat
For a beat
I can't speak
Can't even breathe
You sweetly sweep me
Off my feet completely
Weak in the knees
Can't help but stare at your back
Hoping you'll look up and stare at me back
I would approach you but I lack the tact
Fuckboys all that I attract
Does not take a genius to see that
Out of my league and that's a fact
Working up nerve to make some sort of sound
That exact instant you turn around
I tell by your smile you feel the butterflies flutter
In your gut
Get up
Put one foot in front of the other
Strut towards me
I am struck
Muscles melting like butter
Ask for a light
My voice is stuck
But I stutter
A muttered reply
****** up
Not even drunk or high
You ignite not just your cigarette
But a fire inside
Exciting sides of me I thought had died
I can't hide

Hook:
I'm a spacebound rocketship and your heart's the moon
And I'm aiming right at you
Right at you
250,000 miles on a clear night in June
And I'm so lost without you
Without you

Verse 2:
I finally feel like I have reason to live
Maybe an angel like you could forgive
For the things I couldn't give
For all of the dumb things I did
****
No joke
I tripped over you and fell
Too deep of water to swim so I flail
For a moment forget where I am and can't tell
Apart from copycats imitating well
Be exactly like us
They want to excel
In a phony heaven but life is really hell
Scream my color but the world is black and white
And backdrops move but you remain in my sight
But you found me alright
The truth in dead of night
Like a screenplay I might write
And for once get it right
Sitting there in front of me like I got my happy ending tonight
I felt simple for the first time in my over-complicated life

(Hook)

Verse 3:
Processing in your head what the **** I just said
Marriage is a concept way over your head
So you reject my proposal with a shake of your head
and break my heart as easily as you break communion bread
Walk all your good intentions out the door instead
If you don't want to spend your life with me you might as well be dead
Alas the long awaited impending end has arrived with dread
I grasp at missed chances but every last one has fled
My mind keeps on warping
How much more can it bend?
Till it finally is broken?
Hoping for days tears will end and peace will be awoken
I toss and leave my fears with you to keep as a token
Use silence because this time goodnight is better left unspoken

Bridge:
I should have never expected you to feel the same
I shall embrace the misery and face the constant pain
Escape from day to day sorrow and give in to the stress
While body sleeps my brain will fly away and reminisce

(Hook)

Shouting about to all of my homies  
Outlaw, Warsaw, even lil Hacksaw  
There's something afoot  
It's a real hot poppin'  
They say, WHAT  
I say, YEAH, They all say, NAH  
 
I said, something not right  
It's still not a stoppin'  
They said, Oh man  
I said, Oh man  
Everyone in da house shouted  
Oh man  
 
The building is on fire  
Everybody get on down  
Keepin’ da flow, at a very low key  
Get your self way out, spoke he  
Everyone in da house yelled, Okey-Dokey  
'Cause no one wants to be  
Miss USA, runner up, say WHO  
Nup  
 
Everyone in da house shouted, Oh man  
Oh, we bounced on out of there  
We be gettin' in nobody's way  
Uh-Uh  
We're not gunna pop, in someone else's fire  
Not today....