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I feel like having a little part,
A little part of the sun
Like the hope that it brings
Seeking to catch the rays of positivity
To bring some of it into my life,
To still burn brighter,
Rather than burning out
By all things that lead you
To you dismay,
Winding you down at the end of the day.

Sometimes it's perplexing
When I try to rise and shine,
To be brighter than life
These rays of the sun
When it gives me hope,
Knowing full well it will all come undone
By my discretion
With which I can't even cope
Things have some way to spiral,
Spiral out of control
Tricking me into believing
If I even had that power for a fleeting second
Well, some things have a bitter end
There's an end to this pretend
I'm trying to give it more,
More than it needs
Despite knowing the truth
Which is not so great as it always fades,
By the layers of the facade that lie underneath
Can't be unearthed,
It all feels surreal
But the effort is, in fact, very real.

Going back to the childhood days,
When you were bright as the day
Somewhere hidden these memories still lay
Pictures of your innocence,
Dragging you around
The bluntness of reality leaves you to astound
All I'm looking for is a haven
A sanctuary for healing the wounds,
Maybe I'm chasing the wrong thing
Maybe all I need is somebody
Somebody to share the pain,
Someone to hold hands with
Under the beautiful rain
They always say that when you have love,
You don't need anything else
Maybe that is my answer,
Maybe I've been asking all the wrong questions.

Getting over myself, I come to my senses
Life can't be lived in future tenses,
It is what is, right here and now
Not thinking about how you go out
But what you make of it while you still can,
The journey of this ever running man
Running away for myself,
From myself
Maybe I've got everything I need
If I live in this space between
The beauty and pain.

In need of a light
That goes on till by seemingly endless days
Thinking of the impossible, I know
What's the harm in thinking
Of a better place in my heart?
Rather than these graves that I've dug for myself
Where the cold wind blows
All I hear is the silence now,
Never heard it like that before
Trying to make sense of it all,
Still leaves me baffled somehow.

All I need is a little part,
A little part of the sun
To feel the burn,
To feel the warmth inside
A perpetual storm resides within,
Cold winter snow in my soul
The fluctuations of my reality
Finally taking its toll
The moment is edging closer
So I decided to drop this act like a poser
Its time to be real, be a man
I would need a new plan
To deal with these mistakes
From which I can't outrun
Although it is easier said than done
But all I need,
Is a little part of the sun.
Grand Piano Aug 2020
Today is one of those days where it’s just harder to pretend
Ive played this role a million times over
But today  I’m just having a hard time keeping my smile in place
I’m trying but every time I pull myself out of this muck
I sink right back down to where I started
That twinkle in my eyes just keeps fading away
Maybe just this once I’ll let myself really feel
So I wrote this a while ago and saw it in my notes but as I was reading it I thought of a few small revisions. The original is posted as “Bathroom Stall Thoughts”
دema flutter Aug 2020
Growing up
means realizing
that sometimes
you hurt others
unintentionally
in an attempt
to save yourself
from that first
Justin Lai Jul 2020
i'd like to say oh hello like mulaney
grab a pen and craft stories like ashirogi
sing from the heart like chicks from dixie
and be the top percentage like young joey

but when i look at them
i just want to be
all that i am

and drop the hat
the wisecrack
grab a chair,
listen.
waiter there's a meme in my soup :/
E Jul 2020
if i'm broken
will you stay
cause i'm sorry
please don't go away

we pretend
and we lie
but in the end
it's not right

we're over
for now, at least
i'm sorry
for the awakened beast

my heart goes out
to those struggling
to find love
and keep it coming

our hearts have broken
they need to be fixed
but can we do it
it's got me ******

my every cell
is screaming out
please don't leave me
i shout and shout

but in the end
they always do
like birds on a wire
they fly away to you
I often have a dream,
About this feeling
It is an escape,
This love.

I don't know where I am
So I thought of holding her hand
And taking her along
On a journey with no sure destination.

Sometimes I'm stuck
listening to the background noise,
I'm fading out into the unknown.
This seemingly perpetual dip in time
Makes me come back to life.

Realising a purpose
Now that I have her,
It is time to make our journey
Conflate and intertwine
Like Adam and Eve
Exiled from the garden of Eden
Seeking salvation together for eternity.

It is time to put an end to this pretend
Even if this union is treason,
For the summers are always slipping away
But the show must go on
We can escape together now,
Without having to give any reason.
Love is an escape, even when considered unholy or sin, is still pure. Escaping together, breaking the shackles of society and acceptance, towards another reality to fulfil the potential of the union.
luciana Jun 2020
still
as the day surrenders
i find myself
slouched and
still
i'm not one to flock
with others
or be approachable
still
i miss the
excitement and movement
endless nights
still
even if i prefer
a small gathering
i find myself
still
alone. at least
i had a choice to
look present
back then i would feel alone in a crowd, but i wouldn't look alone. sitting in my room I am physically and mentally alone
Ghostt Jun 2020
You
I told myself i didn't want to write about you anymore
But i cant lie, you've shook me to my core
You'll look deep in my eyes
And then your mouth will spit even more lies
I try to run away from you
We both know, you'll just leave me broken and blue
I try so hard to disconnect
It feels like i haven't slept
Don't pretend to love me
We both know, we could be meant to be.
Lara Jun 2020
At my lowest

I can pretend like I’m fine
I can pretend like I’m happy
I can pretend...

But at night lying in my bed listening to the raindrops running down my window or watching the stars I know how I feel

I am the only one who can see deep inside of me

When I’m at my lowest I can pretend
I don’t need any pity

I need to help myself get up
Don’t try to hard to help others
They decide for themselves when they want to get up and shine bright like a star
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