if love is the
last thing
on your mind

then why do I
have to suffer
time and time

again?

I thought I
made the right
choices

but mistakes
were made and
I've fallen

in a pit
of despair.

self-pity,
and feeling
so worthless

that nothing
can ever
compare.

I thought this
would be the last
time

my heart
would be broken,

but it feels
like you
don't even care,

I'm forever
stuck in disrepair.

compromise,
separate

take the time
to realize

there's a point
of no return.

there's no reason to

drag this out
and dig yourself
a deeper hole

compromise,
separate

rationalize
and grow.

there's no sense
of urgency

but you need
to know

broken pieces
always shine,

you're not alone
in this anymore.

he lost his way, he knows not when.
chasing false idols he mistook for men.
he'd lose the child, if he only knew then -
he'd find a way to be a man again.

the past caught up to me
and I

couldn't run away
from it this time.

a fork in the road,

decisions to be made
and I'm waiting, wondering

is life just one big show?

the outcome,
nobody knows,

we're all in it for the ride

trying our best
to keep our heads above water

and not get swept in the undertow.

it's all a game of chance,
and survival

the final destination,
a to-be-determined arrival.

a fork in the road,
decisions to be made,
and I'm waiting, wondering

how long it will take

to break this cycle?

I write poetry to give a voice to people like me who are bisexual, mentally disabled and mentally ill.
I write poetry to give a voice to bipolar people and schizophrenic people because I am bipolar and schizophrenic. And chances are they are afraid to speak up because of stigma regarding the mentally ill and the mentally disabled.
I write poetry to give a voice to bisexual people because I know hiding in the closet *****. And I want to give those people hope if they are trapped in a religious community. Because other queer gave me hope while I am trapped in my religious community. We don't even have a Pride Parade in my town.
I write poetry because I am free here among my fellow poets.

you are driving me crazy
running circles on my mind
with protective gears and all
but maybe,
it should be me who needs to wear them right?
you’re drifting recklessly,
switching lanes frequently,
crashing your way through destructively
in a weird orange-coloured car.

She saved it for a rainy day
When she longed to have her fix
A withdrawal from the nostalgia bank
Would certainly do the trick
For it was among her most treasured memories
A quick revisit she knew would suffice
Not to undo life's wonderful blessings
But to simply feel everything twice

Today I gave in
I went back to bed  
Surrendered to the voices
Inside my head

The incessant noise  
Playing tag with my mind
I tried to find reason
Claim back what was mine

I looked for a way
To shake it right off
A stretch
Work out  
A simple walk

Instead I thought,
If I just close my eyes
I'd cease analysing
The anguish  
Building up inside

I lay there as the music
Fed my soul
Little by little
I took back control

Today was a day  
Where I learnt something new
Being still, is a skill
A tough craft to do

For in my stillness
Radiance will shine through
My super power
My strength
My greatest virtue

Late nights
Toast fests
Shopping in the city
Long chats
Silly dancing
Trying to look pretty

Tears of joy
Some of sadness
An emotional rant or two
Six weddings
A few funerals
Five babies, my three, your two

The good, the bad, we were all we had
The list goes on, it's endless
The challenges life threw our way
Always learning and trying to comprehend it

I had your back
You had mine
Life was good and we lived it
Completely oblivious, no notion of time
Our all - we certainly did give it

So next chapter sis, with this year ahead
Time, is of the essence
Let’s make new memories, relish this life
Take stock and count our blessings

I tried to run away
From all the pain I had
I tried to escape away from all screams
Cause they're making me mad

But they won't let me go
they keep on chasing me
They don't wanna **** me
They keep on torturing me

Sinking in fear
Choking in lies
No place to hide

But I can't bear this more
I've been off the shore
All those things I can't ignore

Wake me up
Pull me up
Tell me it's just a dream
Even it's not
I can't hear those screams more
No more