clothes hugged tight to her skin,
heels as high as a feet,
she walked down the street as stars glew red,  
like the town was her ramp
and the world awaited her.

she must be the daughter of sun.
how else could she burn herself,
to leave me with such a fierce warmth
and a woken monster inside,
succumbing to wallow in her flames forever.

Who are you?
My instinct or my desire
You're taking me higher
And giving me immense pleasure.
My shadow or the liquid
running through my nerves
and absorbed by my bones.
My shade of lipstick
enhancing the beauty
of my unspoken words.
A sweet melodic song
going on the loop
all the time in my head.
I am sitting in a corner
Of my heart,
watching myself dancing
on your tunes.
This is the way I like
to feel you.
Because I know
You're not the real
Only in my muse.

come on, baby
let's go somewhere quiet
you can give me that
hard candy of yours
you know I'd enjoy it

I’ll start acting like a lady,
no more misbehaving,
I promise that I’ll change me.
no more of what we’ve been up to.
I’ll leave it all up to you,
no more of what we used to do.

He was a mysterious young fellow.
Quiet and Serene.
But in bed, he is a god
that can't be contained.

Everyday I tell her
Not to remember your dimples.
Everyday I tell her
Not to find those crinkles,
Your eyes created
While the smile wrapped itself,
Intimately around your lips
And the first nail of my coffin was hit!

Your heart is stuck in someone else,
And mine I have left in your closet.
After all the time that has passed
I am still staring,
At the empty mug to hold just a drop,
A drop to satisfy this craving
Or maybe just to forget this thirst.
Thirst,quenched not even by the elixir,
Elixir that saved the life
But could not fill the emptiness in it
Could not give it a meaning to be lived.

All I need is  a bit of you,
But sigh! I can have that never.
Yet I love you
Just the way you love her
Someone said it right-
One sided love holds an alien kind of peace,
Peace in the pleasure offered by pain,
Pain that I, so passionately chase.

I stare blankly at the
bathroom wall
where the tiled portion
meets the faded blue paint
as it soaks in...
I liked it

The years of unrequited love,
the chase for affection,
the tortured artist
twisted up in twisted tortured
feelings

I spent year writing
dark poems,
letting the liquid manifest as a physical representation
of the tears shed
and bleeding heart.
Did I like it?

My existence was
wandering streets alone,
getting lost in melancholy songs,
wondering if love equated pain.

Then I found
what I told my notebook
I'd been searching for all along.
Someone loves me,
someone gives me love,
and I spent so much time searching for it,
enjoying the hunt and
getting gratification out
of my own self-deprecation
that I'm lost even though I'm found.

Do I like it?
Did I like that?
Do I like this?

I can't seem to decipher
affection and how it's supposed to
make me feel
versus how it does.
Did I like looking for it more than having it?

Am I so ****** up that
I love not receiving love more than receiving it?

I don't want to run; I want to stay;
I always used to run
to
     and away.