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Psychostasis Dec 2019
Sometimes I see my past in your present
The twinkling eyes with each smile that radiates a room
The disappointment in self each lecture and post tantrum
I get scared about that sometimes because I want you to be better than me

But then I remember that people aren't "better" or "worse" than one another
And I shouldn't expect something I don't personally believe in
To apply to any situation
Let alone to you

So I struggle between

Raising you around your happiness, because I want you to have what I couldn't so ******* bad

And
Raising you with discipline, for the most righteous fist is the one that holds back when it isn't needed

And
Raising you as carefully as if we called a claymore mine home, and walked a driveway of tripwires

I parent in a tip-toe style
Hoping the foot prints I leave for you aren't too large for you to be unable to fill
While simultaneously hoping you don't follow them too closely
Or even that if you do, you won't be afraid to stray the path

I want you to be a great person
By your own volition
And sometimes I feel like I influence you too much
But you're still only a child
And have much to learn
And I as your humble caretaker, teacher, and protector
Really wish I knew exactly what the lesson plan you need is
But until I know what to do
I'll continue to try my hardest for you
Until the day my heart stops,
My teeth shatter like frozen tissue paper
And my last breathe and effort dissipates into the clarity you'll need when you need it.
Carlo C Gomez Dec 2019
Jack and Jill ran up a bill
To private school their daughter.
Jack fell into schemes and broke his dreams,
And Jill came crumbling after.
Cordelia Rilo Dec 2019
I'm a drug addict
I'm sorry I don't have anything better to say.
Did you know I have secrets I keep from everyone?
Is that normal?
The things I've done for drugs would make me sick so I don't think about them.
Everyone wants to be a better parent than their parent because they did such a bad job, but they did their best and my best will only be sub-par.
Where are we going?
Are we just looking through the rear view mirror as we drive away from the fire?
TS Ray Dec 2019
I wish I had more time,
maybe slow the seconds on a dime,
double the minutes it’s already daytime,
add few hours to this joint show knowing it’s our prime time.

I have watched her thru pilot season,
grew a bonding even from preseason,
fast forward to now, and grew she did,
walk with me slowly god forbid,
as you are my everything in this unending void.

I thought I wasn’t good enough,
all my instructions and advise I thought were too tough,
yet she knew my acting tough was a bluff.

Amidst all the chatter my mind thinks,
as I wanted to say how I felt,
she wouldn’t let me complete and said jinx.
our walk together was complete,
my mind was ready to binge watch her grow again.
TS. 2019.  Bond between a mother and child from mother's eyes.
Ian Dunn Oct 2019
I know it's hard when I go away
It'd be easier if I could always stay
But here's a promise to you
I'll always come back for you

When I leave, it's tough
I think we've all had enough
I wish it would end too
So I could spend more time with you

I didn't see you learn to walk
I didn't hear you learn to talk
I'm missing more now too
But I'll always be there for you

Soon I'll be home to stay
Then we can hang out and play
Those gray skies will turn blue
Cos I'm coming home for you
Luludi Oct 2019
They messed with my head real good
Was it that I misunderstood?
How you kicked the tree ‘till all leafs fell
Left to rot in hell
The freak created is on you
You’re the one who’s cuckoo
Ali J Fogwood Sep 2019
Forgotten to take the pill, was it?
Or perhaps somehow the ****** split -
An accident, or surprise?
Just the sorts of thoughts suspicious minds
Might have of couples
like you.

Not that anyone said those things with you in mind,
But I think there are other suspicious signs;
To begin, I'm wary of a child born on a midwinter day,
cursed with snow every third birthday,
Or maybe I'm suspicious of the harrowing sight
of a miniature pair of shoes,
Or a child returning, smiling (or teary eyed)
from a first day at school.

When we go on, with us die (at least it is said)
our first snowfall, first kiss
First rush of joy to the head,
The first (and last) love
vanish too when we come to be dead.
Not so sad a thought, I say, for just to be born
Is to be handed a road-map, and that job is yours.
The map must take us entire from hither to yon
So put clear crosses on the junctions beyond
To spotheights that matter, that you yourselves found;
First last dance, last love
Second **** (perhaps), but surely first bike,
First time to lay awake with friends too late in the night
First getting up and first falling down
And to know the outdoors and be cosy inside
To be loyal in friendship, and savour the ride
And know, that for all your love
Noone survives.

But with all that aside, I conclude,
What it is that I mainly suspect, (far worse than the rest)
Is the thought of a child so ignorantly blessed
To have been born to such wonderful people
As you.
Ali J Fogwood Sep 2019
Aged six, I think, charging through the front door,
With a mesh of macaroni painted and glued in the shape of a car
Stuck out at the end of two tiny arms:
Here's what I made for you!

Then a childhood flies by and before you can think, then we were four-
Now only three.
Perhaps you are off pottering about, in a room out of view
On some eternal Sunday afternoon
Having left, as you were wont to do
Your tea going cold on the counter.

I step back through the door, now twenty-six
And you're looking out from the kitchen,
Quietly smiling, golden sun painting shapes on your loose old tee,
And see me as a man, a bank account, two pips a master's degree
and a car, achievements won
just as messy as the spaghetti twenty years before
That I made for you.
Nadia Aug 2019
In a moment of defeat and despair,
we begged, “What will you eat?!”
"Noodles!" She declared.
"Noodles," we agreed, "noodles are fine."

And so noodles upon noodles upon
noodles we’ve tried: noodles boiled,
steamed and fried; strings, tubes and
swirls; noodles shaped like bunnies,
unicorns and dinosaurs; in sauces
and soups, in cheesious goops;

noodles with veggies (until veggies
were banned); noodles with
mushrooms (only from a can);
noodles made of wheat, lentils, rice or
corn - noodles made of everything
noodles could suborn.

Noodles for lunch and for dinner -
noodles again and again and again
- and what then? How many times
can one noodle? How many noodles
until brains begin to spill onto plates
in a braineous-noodle-ous state?

Noodles for breakfast - can’t do it.
Noodles for lunch - can’t get thru it.
Noodles are banned! Noodles are
not welcome near here - never again!
At least not today anyway.

Ok, fine...


NCL August 2019
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