Don't blame me father
My insatiable hunger for love and insecurities
When all you gave me was piles of paper
that I couldn't even burn to keep me warm
To melt the ice ***** you stuck in deep.

Do you remember what you did to me?

You threw me off like a burden to the fire
You drove her mad, so she hurls it out
All on me.

You laughed and told me I was mad, then
told me. **** it up. Don't tell me. Be a good daughter.
Take my money and leave.
I have all the gold but I don't know what it's like, Dad,
For a man to love me.

Don't shame me mother
For clinging onto strangers, eager to please
Shying away from you and all my responsibilities
You took all your hatred for him
And unleashed it all on me.

Did you remember what you did to me?

You wanted a daughter that wasn't me. I was too wild.
So you despised everything I loved
About me.

You said I don't ever do enough, I never please. But
I am not your puppet on a string
And you are not my priority.
I love you so much, Mum, but I am the happiest when you are
Not around me.

one must say, "I'm set"
for the noblest human role
of bearing a child
it is not just a fruit of
those nights we lack conviction

I often wonder about my own origin
I wonder how much of me is from just one woman
I also wonder if I am anything like the man
Does my DNA from her make me the good student I am
Does it explain my ever present sarcasm and attitude
I wonder if we have the same personality or mood
I wonder about my appearance and hers
Does her hair also fall down her back or shape her curves
Does it reflect in the same golden way that mine does
Does she also let hers grow too long just because

I know you from online
And from the few files I find
Is my height, or lack thereof, from you?
(After all, I'm only five foot two)
Do all my half siblings know of me, or just you?
Do you talk to my father? Does he want to meet too?

I meet you this week
17 years or 6,463 days
Not a moment too late
A reunion like an awkward first date
I was told to "expect nothing" from it
That I can easily call to just quit
But I know more everyday that I am ready
I want my family tree to be a little less webby

I want you to know I am not mad
I do not cry because I am sad
You are the reason I live the life I have
I cannot be more grateful for that

I understand the choice you made
That raising me was a price you had to pay
Your past is not something to regret
The questions I have are nothing to fret
You might fear the how's and why's
But they're the last thing on my mind
I just want to meet you for you
And to thank you for giving me the chance to live anew

The world is vast I see

Yet there is no where I wanna be


My yearning does not include this

All that is out there have been


Except that which was given to me

By that which comes within me


This little hand grasping me

Is a string that tugs deep within


All that is precious to me

Comes forth the day I call thee baby

Now I know,
how I can see the sun.
It is not my eyes
that take in the rays,
it is you
buying us Mike and Ike candies in the morning
on the way to school
you saying,
"Now, don't tell your mom!"
all four of us banging our heads
to classic rock.

Now I know,
how I can feel
It is not my skin
that senses the sand on the beach,
it is you
taking me to my first scuba dive
so proud of your daughter
Me, a fish!
The only one who didn't ***** on the boat.

Now I know,
It is not my heart
that feels the morning
after a dark night.

It is you, Dad, it is you.

my son shall be a reflection of me with the mirror being his mother. he will have my eyes and his mothers heart, my brains but his mothers demeanor. we all know he’ll need it. the courage will come from us both because your mother is a warrior as am i. we fight. never let them see you down son, if you fall remember: gravity centers lowest to the ground, you shall gather yourself up and stand strong. and when the waves come crashing because they will, when they crash just know that you are a warrior. there is no mountain big enough in comparison to your potential, no storm loud enough to quite your spirit and no accolade too great to make you gloat. my son, you were made under the shield of love, so you shall forever be protected. never let anyone tell you otherwise. when you see a man down keep your arms outstretched, warriors can fight for the less fortunate too, but stand proudly in your body. and when they ask why you are who you are you simply respond: I am a reflection of my father in the mirror of my mother.