It hits like a bullet.
Caught off guard,
Triggered by the circumstance,
Fuelled with the negative thought,
Your mind starts to race and all sense is blur.

It hits like a tsunami.
One second you could breathe,
The next your nostrils and mouth is forced shut,
Your insides are burning,
You’re crashing against sorrows
And there’s oh so much desperation
For the need to simply
Breathe.

When the feeling is this intense
You won’t know what hit you.

from nerves, I cannibalise my fingers
my blood clots, and dries out
crusty and painful
yet I keep on pressing, biting
because it gives me focus
a sick type of satisfaction,
a sense of control.

I whine tears leak out, my eyelids stuttering,
Tired
my fingers bit, bone exposed and ******
my fingernails and fingerprints
all gone,
remains lay in my stomach
acid consuming the scraps of skin
this is what I call my very own cannibalism.

when i get nervous i cannot eat.
this is eating me alive.

I slip you the paper in anticipation

Does she like me?

I move in and stay up all night laughing with you

Does she like me?

You return a new piece, covered in doodles

She likes me?

Nervous
Nervous
Nervous
Nervous
My nerves have failed me yet again.

Twitching
Twitching
Twitching
Twitching
My senses are overwhelmed again.

Shaking
Shaking
Shaking
Shaking
My body can’t handle what it’s taking

Hurting
Hurting
Hurting
Hurting
My diaphragm is twisting and turning.




                     I’m scared.

You're not my type
Not in the slightest
But yet, there you are making me ever so nervous
And yet, here I am primping myself up for no reason

You're not my type
Not in the conventional ways
But yet, here you are saying my name and I blush
And yet, here I am writing about someone who doesn't notice me

You're an anomaly in my day to day functions and I am ready to explore