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REMEMBRANCE of HARRIET HARRIS –

mile ate mum: Christened as averred one Harriet Kuritsky. A Brooklyn babe born on November 13th nineteen thirty five, the youngest (and last of the lot tubby alive) of four siblings (only one brother), whose Brexit from world viz terminal illness, she did not survive.

The following emotions communicating heartfelt grief practically vanquished as existence turned a new mo' tiff leaf. A recurring abysmal grief stricken state consumed my entire being immediately fool low wing her demise, but pooch less so now. Perpetual tears of sadness seemed not to a-bate, when grim reaper brandished signature scythe 'n of deadlocked fate.

Twas about 11:00 a.m. 2005 third of May, our dearly beloved mother fought tooth and nail to keep death at bay (as recounted by eldest and youngest sisters, who elected to remain on vigil that day), nonetheless rigor mortis upper hand brought (supposed) painless swift death, her diseased and emaciated riddled body gone lifeless and ashen gray.

Profound mourning brought misty eyes
from only heir misses, whom hissed mom
more so than then now, but noneless
more than plaintive words spell
with agonizingly pained heart and soul
rent asunder psyche pell-mell
no amount of weeping can quiet and quell.

Cathartic for me to give posthumous ode
conveyed in an easy to read poetic code
to help accept finality and permanent loss,
now only retrievable from nostalgic memories
identified as childhood doghouse favorite abode.

Her cremated ashes no longer remain sealed in nondescript box boot scattered to the four winds at a favorite secluded spot - that really rocks with the Moss evoking a spring stein.

White, powdery chalk like material
devoid of any vestigial semblance
to her once living and vibrant self
that unique persona pulverized and vaporized
(housed former svelte and tall
Arthur Murray ball-room dance teacher
a half-century plus prior to her demise

which beauty, charm and grace quickly
caught the attention of my father
who courted and eventually proposed
to this young flirt and tease of a gal)

inert organic matter represented sole
residual embodiment reduced to dust
and near nothingness former corpo
real being of blood, bone and flesh

weighing no more than a dozen hatch marks
on the scale absence bore down heavy
like millstones round the neck per
black void created by defeat with
Grim Reaper toward this woman,

who birthed and nursed me into
manhood momma’s only grown son
felt torturous ripples of grievous sadness,
no matter years of suppressed anger,
and rage in addition to emotional
conflicts between us, which
in variably wrought unpleasant relationship
and legacy of discord writ large across
the tapestry of mine existence.
Dreamer Jan 2018
::
I went to visit her yesterday...she had grown much beautiful and lively, her heavenly eyes, angelic voice, she is still the most beautiful girl I have ever seen... I told her I had to soothe my heart ache that has been spreading all over now.. she stayed silent and did not even mourn over my pain... she was standing right in front of me physically but I missed her.. it felt like she was not even there... the girl I loved and planned to cherish my whole life with... I felt helpless so I went home to drink the potion of off her pictures like I always did.. and like every other time, the potion covered the wounds but never healed them...
She left my heart scarred, my life discolored and my faith blemished.. despite everything, I have no complaints, no regrets and no worries,, cause my love for her is like a flowing river, that just knows to flow.
HR Dec 2017
kjh
i'm sorry
you couldn't find anything
to firmly grasp

i'm sorry
i couldn't be there
to hold you in my arms

“he's in a happier place”,
they tell me,
but i know it's not enough

when i know that,
without you,
my happy place is lost
Poetic T Dec 2017
We mourn our final expiration
                         never realizing,

That we were decaying from
                       our very first..

Dilapidation upon a
                         very first breath..

Dying from the moment we were born.
bymslu Nov 2017
We were never them
their glass would shatter and scatter
when hard times came
but you and i
we may have cracked
but our shortcomings became masterpieces
artefacts
of what we used to be,
celebrations of what we weren't:

then we fell
through the same cracks we celebrated
and nothing broke our fall
so we floated,
drifting
in disbelief, we gazed at each other
where a thrashing ocean of emotions
pierced our stare,
a draining era
that left us like them,
shattered
and scattered.
. . .when we happened to us.
G Rog Rogers Oct 2017
I mourn you for all
that was stolen
I mourn you for all
that was lost

I mourn you that
You were betrodden
Until nothing was
left that once was

Your life had
a beautiful reason
You can't be accused
of living in vain

Your days were made full
of goodness that's lasting
Yet the tragedy of all
that's about you remains

Cry me
because I'm here
without you
Cry you
because you're
gone far away
Cry We
that we lost
all We treasured

I mourn Your loss
forever somewhere
beyond my very last day.

-R.

6.23.17
-LA
-4MAR
Rvsd.

©ASGP
Cal Ashiq Oct 2017
The moon took a peek at me tonight
It reminded me of you my loving light
How you made the days of my life so bright
How I long to hold you in my arms so tight

The star I'm staring at right now
Made me reminisced of our vow
Though these conditions for us won't allow
We'll find each other someday somehow

Till then this heart would long
It will mourn with every tragic song
My darling this love for you will remain
To have you again I'll persevere every pain
tory Oct 2017
and death stroke once again.
So, so you think you can tell.
Heaven from hell.

Flower crowns and hanging art, fill the walls of the room.
Bright colors surround her, like a tie dyed kaleidoscope.
Pictures of friends and families sit on a bookshelf,
While trophies from past poetry contests line in.

Blue skies from pain.

Her long hair bounces, to a familiar Pink Floyd tune.
Rosemary scents fill the room, matches burning the coated bamboo.
As the smoke leaves behind a trail,
Her eyes scan over the wood floor.

Can you tell a green field from a cold steel rail?
A smile from a veil?

Once new and polished, now splintered from the years.
Nails sticking out, causing many accidental cuts.
She runs her rough hands over the broken boards,
Her chewed nails exposed, chipped polish barely covering them.

Do you think you can tell?

Memories flood in as she lifts the floorboard, revealing a rose pendant,
The worn, brassy one that her mother passed down to her.
Closing her hands over it, she feels a sudden breeze.
Soon, two hands wrap around hers.

Did they get you to trade your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?

Not ones to be seen, but more as clarity,
Proving that her mother is there.  
Reminders of laughs and staying up all night,
Singing along to whatever old 70s song was filling the air.

Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?

Dancing like “pros”, even though,
They both new that they weren’t.
But in their minds,
They were whatever they wanted to be.

And did you exchange

A relationship many would fight for, not easily found.
An almost perfect life.
Mother and daughter.
Connection so strong, separated by a driver and glass shards.

A walk on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?

Soft, loving hands replaced with cold, hard ones.
As she clasped hers over the picture frame.
A frame revealing a man,
Not her father, but close enough.

How I wish, how I wish you were here.

A story with no happy ending, instead long nights of endless yelling.
Smoke trails flood in with the last puff of his cigarette.
Alcohol camouflages his minty breath as he comes in closer.
The tears that streamed down her face, and a red sting on her cheek.

We're just two lost souls, swimming in a fishbowl
Year after year, running over the same old ground.

His eyes, so brown and dark, they turned black.
A side of him no one knows, unleashed,
With the help of the poison,
Burning his throat.

And how we found, the same old fears.

She can feel tears starting to fall,
Shaking her head to make the memories disappear.
But no matter how hard she tried,
They were there to stay.

Wish you were here.
Lines in between sections are lyrics
(Song: Pink Floyd “Wish You Were Here)
The clock strikes midnight,
The same way it did last month,
When you took your last breath…
And everyday after that.

Chipping paint that peels from the walls,
Like the way you pulled from my arms.
A seat in the corner, worn-out and tired,
From many sleepless nights.

It still rocks back and forth,
The way you did as you comforted me.
But no more.
You’re gone.

The heater revs up
With heat and fire,
Like your motorcycle,
Now sitting in that ditch.

Regrets of that night,
The words that escaped my mouth.
“I hate you”
Just like I hate the silence that now fills this room.
It’s not fair.

I should have said I love you,
Holding you closer and burrowing my face,
In the crook of your neck,
Instead of this blanket, replacing your presence.

“Good. I hate you too.”
Words colder than the air outside,
Finding it’s way through an open window.
Your sister called, told me everything was my fault.

“If he never loved you..”
Maybe it was all a mistake,
Just like it was when I picked these god awful curtains.
I hate them.

The clock ticks, another hour going by.
Time passing slowly, almost frozen.
Yet with you… It went by fast.
Our time was alive.
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