Life is not a movie
It is not full of tropes
Or unrealistic hopes
Just some ropes
Binding you to the choices you make
Consequences for everything you do
Some make it through life by being fake
Some by their passion

My mistakes keep me awake
I can feel myself break
What’s at stake?
If I cross that line
Can I ever be fine?
I will not whine
for more time
I now have to make a choice
And find my own voice

I thought I was in control.
I promised myself that it wouldn’t happen again,
And it was going so well, it really was.
But things appear to have fallen through.

I tried, you know, I really did,
But it’s like a darkness consumes me,
A howling tempest grips my chest,
And no matter how hard I struggle,
I just cannot break free.

My mind tells one story,
My mouth expresses another.
Words that are not my own form,
And all that remains are regrets.

Do you know someone who heals,
in whose presence you feel whole
you do not have to bow or kneel
nor beg nor fool nor cajole?

Do you know another whose care
and ability to reach inside
erases doubt and lays you bare
your doubt and pride are laid aside?

Distrust in me is the boulder rock
that averts, delays and hesitates,
stems the tide and sadly blocks
the flowing stream of healing grace.

I know there are nights when ghosts of your past try to creep their way in
their whispers echo until your hands begin to shake
and you’re haunted by the pictures of past mistakes
you are so much more than the thoughts that claim you
maybe you don’t miss that part of your life
but it doesn’t mean it was a loss
forgive yourself for the days you felt unworthy
and for the way you reacted to the pain
you are more than the mistakes you’ve made

Wake up fresh - start new today
Each morning a new beginning
I push aside my past mistakes
For this day I choose winning

Disregard my faulty thoughts
Today I think the higher way
I see my clear priorities
And act on them without delay

New beginnings give to me
Vitality and strength of mind
And with my fresh start every day
I live my life from my design

Before I act, I’ll think to ask
Where each simple action leads
By looking ahead (a useful task)
I’ll plant some amazing seeds

Results do not come unaware
Blown in by whim or chance
They come by taking loving care
And by thinking in advance

So look ahead I gladly will
My just rewards I’ll reap
I’ll practice at this helpful skill
Form a habit that I’ll keep

Many mistakes I can prevent
By thinking where this leads
“Looking Ahead” is heaven sent
To help me choose my deeds

Over the past few months,
I've realized nobody is perfect.
Not even myself.

I've realized it's okay to fumble.
It's okay to fall.

It's okay let my emotions
Get the best of me.

It's okay to be angry.
It's okay to be sad.

And I've realized
It's okay to slip up
And fall off the tracks.

I know I'll get right back on the path,
And head towards the direction
The direction towards redemption
And the acceptance of self,
Instead of seeking approval from others.

I know I've made mistakes in the past.
And I've made mistakes in the present day.

For far too long,
I've lived my life,
With a cloud of regrets
Hanging over me.

I can't let the past or present,
Dictate how I live my life.

To move forward,
I have to learn to love myself,
Instead of seeking love from others.

I must learn to forgive myself,
So I can forgive others.

Life is filled with trial and error,
We're all trying to find ways
To find solutions to problems
Instead of trying to fix ourselves.

Today is the day
I work on fixing myself.

I can't live my life
Focusing on the past.

It's time to enjoy life.

It's time to move forward.

I've been staring at this for a minute.
Empty page and my mind just went blank.
Have I lost it, forgotten the meaning?
Where's the way for turning it back?

I've got such a tentative nature.
Can't decide what to do with it all.
How to manage and tame the emotions,
Set my mind to reach only one goal?

Don't belong in my country of origin,
Don't believe in the same things they do.
I can't bare all the lies, they are horrible
Wish to choose my own life, start anew.

See, I had an unfortunate error
Being born where I was has it's price
No one cares who you are or what's fair
They assume, you are bad in their eyes.

Have a wish that's so vibrant and lively.
I might never be able to be.
Who I am, show them my personality.
And sometimes I just don't want to live.