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Don't go, check under my bed.
The monsters are only afraid of you.
Don't go yet. Look into my head.
Where the worst of them live.
The monsters are inside of me.
Can you see them and all the things they do?
They are inside my head, torturing each memory.
At night, I dream that one day I could fly.
That I can escape my head and live in the sky.
The nightmares take over and I fall.
Every night, I am going nowhere.
Maybe if I stay a little longer.
Maybe if I stopped giving a care.
Maybe I can change this strange world of mine.
Gravity pulls me down.
Right when I think I can fly,
I fall to my death.
Who knew it was so easy to die.
But how can I die, when I'm already dead inside?
There's no thought, there's no brain.
Yet again, have I gone insane?
The monsters have taken over my head.
My own thoughts, used to be mine.
So, check under my bed one last time.
pixels Dec 2012
it starts out
so innocently

a nagging thought in the back of your mind
a stray Post-It Note in the files of your memory

it flutters
caught in the breeze
of a wandering mind

another flutters
and then it rips free

you grab them
not knowing
their poison

fatuglystupidfatclingyhatefulfatselfishfatdirtytoxicfatf­atfat

you ****** them away
but they've already stuck
their glue coating your dendrites

you ignore them
the best you can

but their bright colours
and sharp words
flutter so very loudly
grabbing you the way
black-and-white normalcy cannot

months later
you sit at your desk
writing and smiling
and eating and giggling

when suddenly

you hear their flutter
and see that they have woven
into a gorgeous ribbon
of self-hate and pain

it wraps around your throat
freezing the words at the tip of your tongue

coaxing the food from your stomach
the breath from your lungs

and soon
the blood from your veins

you curl into a ball
and cover your ears
but there is no escaping

the ribbons are now ropes
tied tightly around your veins
around your throat
a noose
awaiting your next careless step

finally
you step off the edge of a loving home
or
trace your veins with a razor
or
find solace in a bullet

*suicidalworthlesscrazysuicidalsuicidalsuicidal

— The End —