I never understood why you,
laugh at everything.

Is it my general presence,
an insult or compliment
to my company?

NO. It's cannabis.
You're a little stoner.

Set the mood
Redline
Build the hill
Fill that stem
Inhale. Hold it in.
Take that breath
Relax. Just relax.

I'm  waving the smoke away
Both hands  extensions of
the atrium  that primes the pump
I'm  beating as bleating
Green veil  is parted re  -  vealed
Reveals  the one I'm afraid of  -  the
old me

I'm  counting days defeated
Dead days  used my blood took
the look that I sculpted and weaponized  - it
as something other

Set the mood
Lazerhawk
Build the hill
Fill that stem
Inhale. Hold it in.
Take that breath
Relax. Relax. Relax.

How am I  a slave to myself  I wonder
I wonder

How am I  a slave?

How am I  a slave to myself  I wonder
I wonder

I  ride the ghost train
I  deify  the old ghosts  -  I
I  never meant to board forever  -  I
Am shadow. Am product. The Ubik.
I  deify  the past as answer  -

nothing left to say
nothing left to say

(01101100 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 00100000 00100001 01101100 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 00100000 00100001 01101100 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 00100000 00100001 01101100 01100101 01110100 00100000 01101001 01110100 00100000 01100100 01101001 01100101 00100000 00100001)

(the pleasures of daily life are free
                    are you kidding? nothing is free)

the monotony of the everyday is included in your life (experience not required)
the thing is, if you want to forget the responsibilities of the daily tedium,
if you want to become numb from your reality, on most occasions there is a price to pay
          whatever you desire, there's a bad habit for that;
          alcohol, nicotine, amphetamine...
          take a chance and indulge yourself
          in your favorite inhibitor for your inhibition
          (just don't let yourself fall into submission)

                                        ∞

your face, illuminated in the firelight of the Bic
held tightly between my blistered and burned fingertips,
radiates before the flames as they reflect the fire in your eyes
igniting the deepest desires that lie beneath mine

the flickering flames fall dim
& I see nothing but the silhouette of him
outlined by the glow of dashboard light
while I wait for the moment our lips reunite

I watch him close his eyes as he takes flight

          now, inhale
   & let yourself set sail
          /\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\

your eyes, they're filled with stars
so why don't you talk to me like your mind is on Mars
because the world, it's much too far
from the privacy of your car

where we sit in silence
as the clouds begin to surround
us without warning or sound
& we become enclosed
in a thick cloak
of blue smoke
swallowing us whole

          / *exhale
let the fumes feed your mind & fuel your soul

There’s too much alone
In a lonely soul.
Too many empty hours.
Too many rainy days
Too few sunny ones
Too many showers.

Yes I know it’s depression
And I know it has my name
Pasted on every wave
I know this ugly game.
I know the power it has.
I wish I were stronger.
I held the line a long time;
Not sure how much longer.

There’s too much alone
In a lonely soul.
To many empty hours.
Too many rainy days
Too few sunny ones
Too many showers.

I tried just bucking up
Bootstrap tugging days.
I tried chanting to myself
In Eastern and Western ways.
I started reading self-help stuff
And took up yoga classes.
I tried the usual run of things
Applauded by the masses.

There’s too much alone
In a lonely soul.
To many empty hours.
Too many rainy days
Too few sunny ones
Too many showers.

I begged and prayed to God
To take this burden away.
But so far God himself has had
Not a single word to say.
So now I finally learned
To eat marijuana daily.
I cook it into brownies
And I get along quite gaily!

LSD to hallucinate
Marijuana for stillness
Alcohol to numb the pain


All I wonder is

Who needs drugs when we have music?


-t.s.