Juke box playing
Triggering memory
There’s rain falling sideways
Reminds me of misery.

Another drink of the green
Chase the fairy, in a land of make-believe
Anywhere I can roam,  a place that I can go
Escape the tendrils of reality.

Bruised lips kiss the bottle --
Hoping it can save the pain,
Bible recitals, hoping verses can absolve again
There’s a black box full of secrets
Crashing into the greenery, a lost plane,

“Help me,” scribbled down on a napkin,
A careless sigh from the bar-keep, handing me an aspirin
Demons lean in whisperin’,
Won’t listen, no, can’t let them in.

Dance floor neon -
Calling like a moth to flame,
I’ll let it all loose, let my mind reframe.
But the blood on my hands doesn’t wash
I see her within the stains.

“What did I do? How do I stop?”
I ask in vain
Juke box playing,
Triggering a memory.
Rain falling sideways--
Reminds me of her misery.

I found the answer in words spoken by the mute.
They throw madras but the mantras don’t debut.  
I sleep but my mind is still awake, this vibration I feel takes my spirit out of place.
This world I’m in isn’t meant to be seen, these questions I have aren’t meant for the keen.
These nights are followed by reading this one book.
I’ve imprinted its sentences to keep my mind hooked.
I’m pulled back into a world that’s fallen from grace.
Waisting words to the def keep me out of this place.
After all this one question goes unseen.
Why am I still awake in my own dream?

in the atmosphere
stratosphere
darkness that we do not fear
we find ourselves alone

where is it
that we visit
at night
this seamless ride on a stringless kite
our universe an endless flight
where time does not apply

we hit the bed and jolt awake
remember not our timeless break
a thousand years on a single snowflake
a blink in the cosmic realm

I pray for a lucid dream tonight,
In a sky colored carpet floor,
Seasoned with bluish tulips
on the ground,
In a pure white long dress,
decorated with pearls,
with happy people beside,
Seeing tall pine trees,
With a calming cloudy weather,
Bits of sunshine
that balances the mood of the setting,
Singing behind the white cottony curtain,
Someone's listening
and waiting for me,
Curtain opens,
Ended the song,
Take down the microphone,
I see someone from a bit distance,
A sudden music played,
That made everyones happy tears fell
and touched,
I walk towards where the man is,
Blurred, but as I go forth to him,
Little by little,
He is getting clearer
From afar, I know
That it is you,
Waiting,
At the end
Of the altar.


-A.M.