I sit staring into the wind
With an empty mind
Clueless of what to think
Aimless of what to do .

This feeling troubles me
It vexes me .
I can't find the balance .

Can I do them together
Or do I have to choose
This can't be forever
Hell! What have I got to lose

The question isn't either this or that
The question, is can you bring them both under the same hat .

As I write this, I think I can
Well I have got to ,
For I am a man

The sweet can turn sour
I can tell from the apple core
Because you all are staring through your apple
Take a bite you just might lose your control

I’ve fought myself before,
ready to win at all cost
I’ve already gone to war,
and I’ve already the war lost

we are expected to be held
to a certain standard of living
in which we maintain our facades
and navigate the web of lies
the society has trained us to say
in certain situations that call for them
at what point did we decide
to care about what society thinks
who decided that skinny was good?
and blond hair and blue eyes was perfect
and a dark tan meant good health
that certain brands meant you were a high-roller
at what point did we start giving a ****
about what the worlds standards were
at what point did we lose ourselves
and become tiny pieces of each other
at what point did we become pieces of everybody else
its sad to see we are made of pieces of others
at what point did we lose ourselves
and forget who we really are
i forgot who i was finally
staring into the glare
of a fiery future of people
who are mindless drones
of society

People keep saying
That things will get better
But with each passing day
Things just keep getting worse

The darkness grows more black
Swallowing up all the light
Pushing me ever deeper
Down this pit of despair

Try as I might
I can’t seem to fight back
I keep losing the battle
Falling deeper and deeper

I keep getting told
That I shouldn’t be with him
That it’s best that he left me
That I’m better without him

But the longer this goes on
The harder it is for me to see
The light that will come out of this
And it’s slowly killing me

My chest won’t stop aching
Yet it’s been months
I feel like I’m dying
Over and over

I don’t know what to do
Every time I try to move forward
I’m pushed backwards
To thoughts of us

It feels like my heart will fail
From this ever growing pain
That’s deep in my soul
Begging for him to return

If only my mind wasn’t shattered
If only I did things differently
If only she didn’t come into his life
Them maybe things would be different

Maybe I would still be with him
Maybe I wouldn’t be in so much pain
From losing the one I love the most
But I fear my time is almost up

I grow weaker with each passing day
My migraines are getting worse
And the pain in my chest grows rapid
I fear I will never get him back

I fear that I will die before that can happen
That my life will end very soon
Because what most people don’t know
Is that a broken heart can be fatal