I feel my memory slipping away
In and out
A phantom in my mind
Misinterpreted by my paranoia
Engulfed in my clouds of depression
Exaggerated by my anxiety
Repressed by the constant fear of never remembering anything
While making new memories each day
Knowing I may not remember it by next month
or next week
or tomorrow
But I make them anyway
I'm cognizant of my ability to be here
In a certain place and time. For a specific reason.
I'm aware it is happening, while I know it also may fade.
I reason with myself with what I need to try my hardest to remember or not.
They all seem dull in hindsight, with a few bright lights here and there.
It will get worse with time and medication.
I can't do much else but try. And write. And re-read the memories I either remember or forgot having in whatever mindset I was in at the time.
Euphoric, depressed, aware, irrational, whatever.
Needs more editing and it is choppy but it's my first on here so here goes nothing.
