I swore I’d never fall
in love. If I did, I lied
it's just a crush, careless,
I don't go crazy of it at all.
I swore it would never stick
But my heart now ticks
with thoughts of you, and I've been sick
with you ever since.
A limerence is fleeting, they say.
But loud as a debt unpaid.
If ten years isn’t long,
then what’s this fever?
Why in my ribs
your voice lingers?
YOU—
closer than my own pulse.
Without you,
I forget how to beat.
If I’ve been sharper since you came,
if I wake alert, cautious,
if you’ve carved me into something better—
then fine. Let it lie.
Let it sneak in,
let it crush me alive.
I’ll keep pretending
I don’t know its name.
it started as a piece of journal I wrote probably a year ago. It was full of typos and grammatical errors but also considerably raw. Call it love, obsession, infatuation, crush (!) or whatever, but then I found out about limerence, although I’m still not sure whether it can fully describe what I’m feeling. But I think it might be the closest.
