what
is heavy
full to
the brim
let it out
smoke like
into the night
that a new
road curves
before me

What's stopping you from doing what you're aiming for?➳
Who keeps closing the door?
Have you ever tried with all your will,
Then found yourself completely still?
Is it lack of money?
Or is my life so sad, it's funny?
Are you running out of time?
Or have you simply lost your mind?
- Who's stopping you from getting your **** done?
-But then you hear the music, and realize it's time to have a little fun.*☮
© Brittney Hibbert 2016

To be honest
I was playing the guitar for you the whole time


but

I knew you had a thing with this dude
& he seems cool.


So I was just gonna keep playing this guitar song until my guitar broke...
M

walking through the woods i was surrounded by a plethora of golden bronze amber leaves tumbling in the wind sparkling with a star fire that evanesced from their jagged edges upon their descent.  i stood entranced, mesmerized, utterly hypnotized by their glorious magnificence.  i observed with intensity as a golden bronze amber leaf never having been attached to the majestic tree had no need to let go but gently released.  feeling no trepidation it wholly lacked desire for manipulation to control the forces of the wind.  i watched in awe and wonder realizing that it never disengaged from the tree knowing that separation is an illusion; it simply became the wind.  whirling it shimmered in the autumn sun as it wafted with no need for reins allowing its destination to unfold.  gingerly cascading it settled tenderly on the ground resting comfortably in ambivalence.  i sensed it did not cringe when it was picked up by an unsuspecting boot but intuitively knew immediately that it was being carried and dropped off serendipitously at an auspicious location.  i listened to it intently and drank in its essence as it simply lay in being not obsessing over what would happen consequent but sat in sheer stillness seemingly encompassing all totality.  i was stunned to see that it lingered without judgment in undivided clarity for what wild synchronicity would come.  it quenched its thirst in mystery while being completely at home in uncertainty.  the golden bronze amber leaf seemed one with all that is while simultaneously retaining awareness of self-perception.  as a gentle gust of wind coalesced with the beige fall sky it literally merged with the momentum enjoying the ride to its perfect destination.  with delicacy it rested cozily in ambiguity whispering to me that heaven is a state and not a place.  i vow surrender to black and white existence pledging fearlessly to climb higher creating life with vivid vibrancy adding golden bronze amber to my palette of colors with which i’ll paint.

©2016 janetaylor

The more I talk with you,
The more I fall for you.

How cute and beautiful you are,
Only I know,
How lucky I'm to have a girl like you,
One who always listen.

I cry sometimes,
When I realize I don't deserve anything of you,
You are just way out of my league.

But still I have you,
And no matter what,
Oceans dry,
Earth shatters or the sky bursts,
I'm not letting you go

(Name here )
The things I think about
All have to do with you
They'll never be written with this pen
You're a topic
I rather leave unread
When you come into mind
I tend to distract myself
From everything I feel
Cause without you by my side
Makes this life a bit more of a hell
I'll let all it roam
Feelings, thoughts, dreams & memories
Will flood my mind
But I shall not speak
And won't allow it to be seen in ink
All the things I think
When you pop into mind
Cause it irks me to know
That everything roaming
In head & heart
Will soon be overflowing
the sound of your name
Flashbacks of what was or was not
Drown me inside
Leaving me trapped in my mind
Cause if I were to speak
Or let it be seen with ink
Tears would never stop flowing
Till I could see you again
Just as my friend
Making it easier for me
To feel and live again
And finally be free

I found the dog with a newborn bunny in her jaw
I demanded that she lay her down so I could pick her up
She was shaken, traumatized, bleeding internally with bite wounds all around her two inch body
She was beautiful
She could not yet open her eyes for she was so young
Abandoned by her wild mother perhaps
I wept as I held her close to me
I felt her terror swell in my heart
I touched her once, she flinched
I touched her twice, she slowed
I stroked her baby fur with the back of my first ******* like wiping away tears from a child's cheek
I felt her heartbeat align with mine as she burrowed undeneath my breast, above the space where the edge of my hand pressed against my body
Searching for her mothers comfort
I loved her, I wanted to keep her, to raise her up and watch her grow
To save her
But they told me she was suffering and needed nursing to continue living,
To put her out of her misery
So I did, I captured her, she captivated me, what a life she was
I laid her down in a hole the dog had dug beside the garden
And I left her there with peace in mind.

love,

months swiftly passed
since that enchanted night
i never wished to end,
as it was then that i first
laid my hands,
and my eyes,
unto yours.

i have been wildly spinned
throughout the dance,
and eventually,
throughout your world.

it was those dazzling eyes
that hooked me most
without an utterance of a word.
it was those precious gems
that connected us,
that made me fall in love
with you more.

but only then did it hit me,
i didn't want to fall in love.
what i wanted was to grow in love.
and you don't make me grow.

i know and i accept
that letting you go
and setting you free means
letting you love someone else.
but love,
it is that i am in doubt.

i did not dream of a love
full of doubt, full of lies,
and overflowing with fear.
i did not dream of a love
full of questions
and full of secrecies.
or maybe,
i just did not dream of a love
with you.

i could not stand to feel that
you are mindful of my pretense
but you smile and refuse
to believe i am lying to you.
i could not stand to feel
the sadness i give you
that you hide
and that i am inept to solace.

i am afraid that one day
i might wake up to see you
happy for being with me
but you don't see the same.

love,
my feelings did not
gradually fade.
it vanished in a snap
and i am afraid
it might be back, too,
at once.

i doubt you accept me again
when my love returns,
or when my love is sure,
and i doubt i might
let you go again.
but by that time,
if you've found the rightful one,
let me apologize for being unable
to control my feelings back then -
my feelings today.

honey,
there is nothing wrong with you,
nor is there with me,
but there is with us.

love,
you need not to hurt anymore,
so for the last time,
i love you and good bye.

i loved you.
good bye.