Like always you cut me exhausted hungry destitute alone freezing stuttering in coldness without you.
Unaware of how you would pop up with open ended questions
to decide my life without you.

To answer your question with awareness fairness realizing it was you who questioned me;
out of the blue using a new name de plume that I had to intuit it right
that it was you
or forever miss my mark.

No it's never too soon nor too late,
for lovers to meet face to face;
after each catastrophic storm
had ended,
or after a lifetime or two.

You were the only real man
back with me after each storm.
hopping I rescued myself!
You reappeared dead silent,
Talking your own language and you never hinted what hell I lived through.
How astounded in shock wounded i was you carried open ended questions
for me to make lifetime decision
with my shattered heart.
you failed to realize struggling to survive homeless without resources
have no time for healing wisdom.

Why in the world do you ask such questions behind this mirror!??
And sadly for me, in my own answer,
you found your road ahead
with a significant other!.

That was easy wasn't it!?

Should I spell the many
Name De Plume on here HP with your many windows you used!?
You closed some and left others open.

I know you read me on here
delivering anonymous messages
  was that fair!?
~~~~~~
I live by this biblical rule:
"Love is patient, love is kind.
It does not envy, it does not boast,
it is not proud not covertly hidden..
It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,
it is not easily angered,
it keeps no record of wrong doings.
Love does not delight in evil
but love rejoices with the truth.
~~~~~~
It was never too late or soon dear;
you just asked too many **** questions, and in my suffering pain
I missed my mark again.
You made me stumble and fall.

Yes fall always, with your help.
~~~~~~~
By: Karijinbba

People who are always late
Are like missing fingers,
You can't count on them.

late night drives,
cold, warm,
wet, dry,
safe, happy,
alone together,

late night drives,
music loud,
laughing, love,
rain falls,
feelings felt,

late night drives,
gotten later,
colder, darker,
so much darker,
now, everything's gone.

No one knows
What love is
Until the freefall

I wrap my ribs in blankets and attempt to get some sleep
But I am kept up by “baas” from imaginary sheep
I have counted so many I lost track of the number
Yet not one nudged me an inch toward my slumber
And even in the quiet hours foreplaying dawn
No tiredness is found
My mind races on
I am comfortable like my bed is made of bricks
Turning and tossing as the second hand ticks
Knowing I am not going to get a wink of shut-eye
But optimistic enough to try
Close my eyes to the movie playing outside my window pane
Colors changing
Black to pink to blue
Do not entertain
It washes over me slowly
Like the tide rolling in
I surrender to insomnia
Not strong enough to win
I listen to the rustle of wind sifted through branches on trees
And let my brain be carried away to fond memories
It’s not the same as drifting off but it comes pretty close
If my head must remain active at least it's engrossed
I would like to catch some Zs but they keep slipping away
Hands as slow as the transition from night to day
I'm looking for an escape to ease my weary soul
Some sun to light my insides
Darker than coal
My weakness gets the best of me
Drowning me in fear
Convincing myself demons are worse than they appear
But as the blackness inhabiting my room begins to lift
Something stirs my senses and I feel a distinct shift
I forget all the obstacles in the way of my rest
A weight is no longer pressing on my chest
Just as everyone else starts their daily routine
I finally doze and enter a world more serene
The dreams I wished to visit but were too far for so long
Are now mine to live in
Only to me belong
It may have taken more time but was surely worth the wait
When it comes to sleep no such thing as too late