A ballroom echoes without song,  
Where shadows waltz with ghosts unseen,  
And silence sings where I belong.  

Your touch, a whisper on the skin,  
A breeze that dances, then is gone,  
A fleeting breath in an empty room,  
The ache of dawn before the dawn.  

Lover, I’ve tasted your absence sweet,  
Like wine that’s poured from shattered clay,  
Each drop a vow that drifts away,  
Lost to a sea where echoes fray.  

What is love but a vacant sky,  
A canvas torn by wings that fled?  
What is passion but quiet dust,  
On books that whisper what’s unsaid?  

I’ve called your name in secret tongues,  
An offering to the void between,  
Where roses bloom with thorn and vine,  
And fade to ash in midnight’s sheen.

do you remember me? it's been four years. i look so different, but i think i might have seen a flicker of recognition in your eyes, maybe a smile. you look pretty different, too, with that half-baked teenage beard and that new school uniform. i remember how our old school uniform hung off your lily-white shoulders, not yet grown into. you've grown so much. I'm half-convinced i dreamed you, as you were years ago. i saw you and felt a tug in my gut, almost like stepping into a childhood home where someone else has set up a life. why am i am so stuck on seeing you, like it left a hook in my lungs, like a scratched-up CD? maybe because i knew you, but not anymore. maybe because we never really said goodbye. maybe because it was always, always complicated. maybe because we were friends. maybe because of the thumbnail car you left on my hand. maybe because i miss you. maybe because seeing you shot me right back to five summers ago when all that mattered was the melting heat of the oval grass and who we ate lunch with. i hope i see you again. maybe next time I'll say hi. maybe point out the scar and fit it to your thumbnail. maybe never tell you i picked at the scab over and over to have something to remember you by. maybe ask you about your favourite movie.

i stood on tiktok
scrolling for hours,
trying to find a poem or situation
that describes ours.
i was hoping
maybe i'm not the only one
feeling this way
but as i realised i need to write my own poem,
i didn't know what to say.
you confuse me,
and i confuse me too
wondering if my feelings for you
are fake, or are they true?
i really miss you,
and i miss talking to you
but sometimes i feel like
if we were a thing,
i would only make you blue.
i'm starting to be okay with
the fact that i'm alone,
but late at night i always re-read our old chats,
and they often feel like home.
i'm confused, because sometimes
i can easily pull through,
but other times i cry to best friend about
how much i miss you.

I hate to say this, but I miss you
On days when I’m angry at you
I recount every memory of you
I miss you on the saddest days and even the most delightful ones

I hate to say this, but I love you
I’ve loved your fairly flaws and even resented myself for loving you
I loved you from the very beginning, I bet I’d do till the end
I love you like molt to holes
I guess, I love every curve of you

Permit me to say this, but I hate you
I hate the way you make me smile
How you get to my skin
I hate how your voice brightens up my day
I hate the ease I feel when talking to you in distress
I hate how I feel when you call me nick names
Gosh! I love them all!
I guess, I called for a white lie

I miss you as my person
I miss the fact that it was just the two of us
I hate I have to share you…
Not you, but the concept of you
I guess I hate myself more for harboring these thoughts I do
But in the end, all these conflicting emotions…
I just miss you.

@Bellah

I know I last heard your voice 16 hours ago.
That I last saw you 24 hours back.
That I last kissed you 68 hours ago.

I know it hasn't been that long.
Well I know that ideally I am supposed to say that.

But I miss you.
And I always want to be around you.
I always want to kiss you.
I always want to hear you laugh.
To watch you smile and to watch your eyes sparkle whenever we spoke.

I want to be in your presence.

**** man.
I miss you

Sita smiles as i bring her a sandwich
Two toasts with butter, ham, and cheese
And yet sita smiles as if i've made her a 5 course meal
Sita smiles as i make her a drink of my own recipe
‘Thank you pepe’ she says
And brandishes a glass of mysterious content
She hasn’t tasted it yet
But still she smiles

Sita cheers for me as i run down the soccer field
She’s waiting for me with a hug, even after games i don't play
From the bench
I can see her smile
Sita is waiting in the car i've known my whole life
‘How was school’ she says
Always with a smile

‘I'm coming home Sita’
It's been 2 years since i've seen her
She doesn’t ask when
She doesn't ask how
She smiles

‘I can't come home Sita’
It's the day after the flight i couldn’t get on
She doesn’t ask when i can
She doesn’t ask but I tell her how I missed it
I tell her i love her and will see her soon
She smiles

It's been 3 years since i've seen her
Sita tells me she has cancer
I tell her she's the strongest person i know
I love her
She smiles

‘I promise i’ll fly out to new zealand to see you’
The last time we spoke
She tells me she hates the food there
I think about how i’ll make her a sandwich, like i used to
I tell her it’ll be okay, she’ll be okay
‘I love you Sita, I promise I’ll see you soon’
She doesn’t ask when
She doesn’t ask how
Sita looks at me, the face I’ve known all my life
And she smiles