every day I had to dig through
deeply rooted malignancies
and clusters of phosphorescent
spider eggs and webs full of
dead flies draped throughout a
long-abandoned domain
once inhabited
                    by my mind

the roots pushed and
twisted their way through
thick walls of the
foundations and membranes
of spirit mind and body
where I didn't even know
how to feel      all I knew is
that I had crossed unseen
         no trespassing signs

in life among the living
I lived as though I were dead
In the midst of vast human
knowledge I held
        vast emptiness instead

this lack of substance was
all that was left in my mind
I found myself trying to buy
back more of what I
had to
          leave behind

my mind and spirit were in
lockdown      in this death I
began to die      when I was
high I felt let down
     in the truth I saw a lie

the dawn of each new day
filled the sky with hues of a
darker light        since all of
the windows were barred
       and boarded-up

the only way I could see
glimpses of a brighter
light or others living life
were through any thin
little cracks I could find

like an addict trying to
avoid their addiction
each new day and every
waking hour I would find
myself learning what I was
        losing my mind
        trying to forget

I was so sick and tired of
     d . . . always going down
          o
        w
           n

truth only strengthened
         this neurotic depression

but in the throes of pain and
breakdown I found hope in
a New Day    
when I was lost
in the cycles of confusion
I at least found pieces of
peace and pieces of mind
        along the way

when I die with the sun in
the midst of the evening
I now find enough faith
   to believe I will
            rise with it again

when I seem to have lost
all of my chances I clutch
desperately to any strand
     of a chance to begin

saving what's left of my mind
buying what used to be mine.

While passing by a great Gothic church,
I see sullen skies begin to glower:
a looming wicked curse
above the church corona’s tower.

With bruised blue clouds brewing black
in the bellowing wide heavens,
hearts pounding, all shrink slowly back:
Blazing bolts scream and threaten.

Here comes the gale force shrieking wraith!
Take shelter from the storm
in the stout fortresses of your faiths
built with those who keep you warm.

For though some tempests last
over rocky spans of fears,
all the maelstrom’s wrath must pass,
even if it lasts for years.

In these sturdy stones you’ve laid,
rebuild for the coming of new days.

My backyard is like the Garden of Eden;
Where birds flourish freely, so too do lizards and worms.
I find myself opening my doors seemingly, 
to welcome the sounds of nature.
But it's also to entice me out to the heartwarmingly,
tree-lined places where I can hide my faces,
And be one, meekly, at first, then more boldly;
Naked and brazen, absent of hazing,
to sit, listen and write poetry.

From the top of a cliff, I joked with a stranger about my fear of heights.

In response, he jumped into the icy waters below and beckoned me to follow.
With a single smile, I was convinced.

I, too, jumped.

She told me to believe in forever,
but even the evergreens have lied to me.

pink blossoms – in the forest of thoughts; I seem
so lost. as a storyteller, I must have consumed a library,
every day is a memory of all that you’ve learned, and
the scriptures on your skin of the Word

where true prophecy reigns – the taste of one’s future
rains, watering faith’s garden. you beautiful tragedy,
making blissful mistakes – life hurts and stresses you
out with heavy thoughts of tomorrow, that you seem
too scared to even let down your hair; it's an anchor

yet in these pink blossoms, any piece of hope blossoms
like a blush on your face – when the slightest beauty
smiles back at your worried face… weary child,
go and pray.

So I did it again,
once again I played the victim.
I did it ever so slightly but her eyes are too clear;
as she knows better.

My Character is my greatest fault yet my greatest beauty.
I am working on it, we are working on it,
He is working on me, He is working through me,
yet when I fall, I fall so blatantly that all can see.

I lock myself in my mind.
Replaying moments of:
what if I did; what if I did not.

NO.

I am wrong.
I have come to the conclusion that most times I am wrong.
Growing older I must accept that I am wrong and seek to change
this mindset that causes me to act out of line.

My divine love, so unconditional and pure,

A truth eternal, steady and sure.

There’s no need to change, to hide or pretend—

You are enough; there’s no need to bend.

I know fear whispers softly, its shadow unfurls,

It’s casting doubt in love’s precious pearls.

The mind replays what the heart has known,

A cycle of lessons, seeds once sown.

You cling to her like I clung to the vampire,

A fleeting comfort, an ember’s fire.

Seeking to fill what feels like lack,

So afraid of solitude’s cold; the fear keeps pulling you back.

I know this place, this hesitant ache,

The ego’s hunger, the heart’s mistake.

It whispers softly, “You’ll never be enough,”

So we have always settled for fleeting, afraid of love’s rough.

But love’s greatest test is not in the fight—

It’s in the courage to step into the light.

The toxic was “easy”, familiar, and clear.

Patterns repeated, year after year,

Familiar ghosts, always so near.

Comfort in chaos, masking the fear.


We choose the “easy”, the well-known pain,

Hoping for joy, but finding only strain.

We cling to the past, though we yearn for change,

Fearing the unknown, reluctant to range.

The familiar wounds, though deep, are safe;

So we self-sabotage love, fearing it’ll break.


Our hearts know better, yet our minds rebel,

Telling stories where only darkness dwells.

But growth begins where comfort ends—

In the unknown, where true love mends.

We search for solace in what we’ve known,

Afraid to leave what we’ve outgrown.

Though our hearts long for something more,

We continue to hesitate, fearing what’s in store.


The past’s grip is a haunting guide,

Whispering doubts that we try to hide.
But love’s power is found when we finally let go,

When we dare to trust and let ourselves grow.

It will be a whole new world, with you by my side,

Where love flows freely, no secrets to hide.

Like Aladdin and Jasmine, hearts bound in grace,

Their souls connected in an enchanted space.

She saw the goodness, the strength in his eyes,

Beyond his station, beyond the disguise.

He saw her spirit, fierce and untamed,

Not just a princess, but a woman unchained.

On a magic carpet, their worlds intertwined,

No walls to divide, no hearts left behind.

So rise, my phoenix, from the ashes of pain,

Burning away what no longer remains.

The chains of old stories, the doubts that bind,

Are fuel for your rebirth, and with peace you’ll find

Mindful whispers and tender care;

Self-love blooms in the open air.


You are worthy—right now, as you are—

A radiant soul, your own guiding star.
Our union can heal what solitude hides,

Opening spaces where real love resides.

No need to change, just let love flow,

For in this moment, you already glow.


Together we learn, and together we will rise,

Healing the wounds and claiming the prize.

Two phoenixes reborn from love’s holy fire,

Awakening truths and lifting us higher.

I feel him in the quiet—a hum in the air,
A pull so magnetic, so tender, so rare.
It’s more than a thought, more than a dream;
It’s the pulse of connection, the flow of a stream.

I feel his energy, his essence, his glow,
Because we are bound in a way only few can know.
Through lifetimes, through echoes, through veils yet unseen,
A love that transcends what has ever been.

I feel him standing tall, yet tender and raw,
Protecting his heart with a strength I admire in awe.
I can feel him closing so many chapters, the chapters of pain;
Breaking old cycles that no longer remain.

I feel him healing his inner child’s wounds,
Slowly finding the joy within life’s softer tunes.
Through the echoes of hurt, I can feel him learning to grow,
Turning his wounds into wisdom that shines and glows.

I feel him moving through shadows, unspoken yet clear;
Making choices in silence, shedding doubt and fear.
He’s untangling illusions, his soul reclaiming space.
He is transforming confusion with courage and grace.

I feel harmony blooming deep in his soul,
A rhythm of balance, a story made whole.
Twin flames igniting, a dance so divine.
We are two paths converging beyond space and time.

I thought I was dreaming, or maybe insane—
To feel his energy like a pulse in my veins.
How could distance not matter, nor time play a part?
Faith showed me the answers that lived in my heart.
For soulmates and twin flames will always defy
The bounds of logic, the limits of “why.”

I now know when his healing is steady and all illusions laid bare,
We’ll meet as one, in a love beyond compare.
I feel his presence in whispers of light,
Our energies merging through day and through night.

I feel his progress somehow, though words go unsaid—
The weight of his journey, the path he has tread.
It’s wild to imagine, but I know it’s so clear:
His quiet transformation speaks loud and sincere.

I feel his efforts, though they’re never declared—
The burdens he carries, the ways he’s repaired.
I’m so proud of his strength, the battles he’s won,
His courage, his grace, the work he’s begun.

And although I feel excited—and it’s hard to wait—
I know we both still have some healing to grow and create.
So, I look forward to when our journey will finally start:
A life intertwined, connected at heart.

One day, we’ll step into forever—a love so divine—
Two hearts reunited: your soul and mine.