my best friend and i go grocery shopping together almost everyday. he has his hair up most of the time but i love it when he leaves it down and it's all curly and wild and the wind blows it across his face when we're sitting on a tailgate finishing the pack of cigarettes that we got the day before. we haven't left each other's side since the last full moon.

my best friend loves the beatles more than anything in the world and i love it when we get high late in the afternoon and we can see the sunset from my living room window while looking at memes and listening to track six off of abbey road. i never thought someone who loved dead musicians as much as i did existed until i met him.

my best friend and i sit next to each other in music theory on mondays and wednesdays. our weekdays feel like weekends because we have so much fun doing nothing even if we have class the next morning. i love it when he smiles because it's the most genuine thing i think i've ever seen.

my best friend holds doors open for me and he lights my cigarettes for me. normally i would take a feminist stand by saying thank you, but i could open my own doors and light my own cigarettes but with him i forget all of that and i actually think there's a 15.6% chance that he might be the love of my life. it's really hard to be myself with all these post-teenage emotions that have made me batshit crazy.

I'd die in my sleep just to dream again, breath again
I would lie to myself just to pretend that I could move on

Its only as hard as you think it is
The Sentiment's
Only around till the season ends, and I know

I wish I understood where I go
In the moments between, when I'm defined
A map of me, written down on a stereo

I've only got enough change, to make it somewhere close
Where do you want to go?

Days that bleed together come up so unclaimed  
Rising out of nowhere
And falling just the same
Stretching out before me, I see sleepless nights
And  a lifetime filled with pain

The storeroom full of daydreams is looking rather forced
I've used up every fantasy, and still I'm still staying the same course

But here comes the refrain
The mantra I try to entertain
Famine is a constant flame
That burns down to the core of man
And lets you understand
Just how this life will end
And there's no real way to win this game

I think i understand when people talk
Even when there's nothing good enough to say
Everybody's lonely on this road, and as we walk
They just want to stave off the silence

"This one ain't about you"
He says trying to rescue his pride

"This one ain't about who?"
She says, smiling on the inside

"It's just me creating art! My tools to distract, to endear, to have fun."

"It's OK to think you are smart my love, but it's a fool who thinks all others are dumb"

"..."

when i started feel a little happy,
the demons inside me started
make me mess things up.

and here i am again,
feeling more unhappy.

Maybe some credit
Is far due
In saying
For I've ticked and tocked
And had people walk all over me

I'm still living proof
That I'm not just a goof
I probably can't do maths
My hands shake in class

I talk pretty big
my size is a twig

But understand this

If I go

You'll have zilch.