Say what you want but that lad means more to me than anything, he’s my best friend my soul mate and the one I love with all my heart, I remember his voice like I heard it a second ago and I can taste his kiss like his lips are mine but I’m so depressed without him he’s my other half and without him I feel so lost my lungs collapse at the thought of him leaving and my heart squeezes tight at the thought of a life without him
I don’t want to breathe air if he isn’t there because without him there isn’t a point
And he has everything I need even if he doesn’t see it cause what I need you can’t buy and what I crave I need you by my side for, see where this is going?
There’s a hole in my chest deep swollen and uncomfortable but with you around I can’t even frown because for them hours I’m complete
I guess I’m a mess I’m sorry in advance
But now you know an my times run out
But thanks again
For you

A dream finds me in
Cotton sheets white and pilly
Which belong not to me
But to the dream that is you
Also enveloped in the familiar fabric.

I do not wake but I receive the message
Clear as if spoken
But necessarily distorted and divine:

Some love is loving parts of a whole,
This is not that.

It is not your voice but the voice of dreams
It is my dream
It is the dream of us in cotton sheets together.

pen,
paper,
late night,
crumpled.

coffee,
sip,
think,
draft.

writer's block
because of you.
overthinking
drown her.

Everything I see,
Turns into ideas.
Poems, paintings,
Music, art.
My life is full,
Unfinished.
Drafts everywhere.
Surrounded by
Undone paintings.
I Sometimes
Have to,
Clean it all up.
Delete, Erase,
Rip apart.
So you can go now.
I don't need you,
You're a
Worthless idea.
It's all
Worthless
Anyway

< >

I
am the crumpled up
rough draft girl
in the wastepaper basket
corner of my mind

she is the file
I deleted
after too many red lines
changed her meaning

this is not my final draft
I will throw myself away
again soon

I do not know why things happen as they do,
But I do know that people exist
To teach us only two lessons
Which we cannot learn elsewhere;
The ability to truly enjoy our lives,
Regardless of how insignificant they may be,
And how to weather the storm,
Left behind in their absence,
So that we may live to see them another day.