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the dead bird Feb 2016
depression
is not crippling sadness
as most think it is.
well, sometimes.
it is
apathy
most of the time

who cares?
no point.
everything *****.

I lost my job today
cried, a little
but I cry about everything.
mainly
apathetic
now I truly have no reason
to ever get out of bed
sure,
I'll look for another
way
to live
but this *****
leaves me with no motivation

no motivation
to apply to colleges,
even though I have
a 3.9 GPA
no motivation
to hang out with friends
even though I am
lonelier than ever

no motivation
to eat food
even though I am
starving

after
I left my now "old work"
I had the impulsive decision
to rescue a dog.
maybe
if I have another creature
to look after
love
feed
I will start
to care for myself, too.

the shelter
made my heart hurt
the kittens
weren't crying
just
sleeping
in their jail cells
uninterested
in life
or their possible new
friend
looking at their possible
rescuer
with disinterest
looking
through their cage
like me.

finnegan
was a terrier mix
a stray
he was whining
licked
my hand
when I reached to him
eight years old
missing
his right eye
life has trampled him
yet he is not hardened
I cried
with him

as I walked him
around the play area
he sniffed everything he could.
curious
investigating
not crying anymore
just happy to be free
from the hell in his cage
he
treated the workers
with affection
like he treated me
with affection

it took awhile
until he came close
and cried while I pat him
climbed in my lap
and cried
I know
buddy

walked him inside.
the woman,
at the counter
looked at me eagerly,
"so?!"
I looked away.
can't
do it
not
today
I'm sorry

him and I
are both looking
for affection
love
a way out of this mess.
but
I can't help him.
no job,
no sure way I can buy him food
buy me food.
I can't
buy a living creature
out of impulse.

he needed security
I cannot provide that
only warmth.

I need to be happy
he cannot provide that
only warmth.

goodbye,
cutie
puller of heartstrings
I promise
someone better than me
will take you away.
not today

lost myself
lost my passion
lost my lust
lost my job
lost
my
soul.
it is everywhere in my life it is unavoidable it is me
'thoughtOutLoud Feb 2016
"The more I know people , the more I LOVE MY DOGS"

Waking up early in the morning by a big shout of "you should do these house chores"
BETTER is my dog who
KISSES* me when I wake up :')
Your love
warms my heart
when it feels
torn apart

I can't wait to see you
but you can't wait to see me too

You lay your head in my lap
and look up at me
you kiss me and I go

          Yuck!

because you haven't brushed your teeth
still you have no forefingers
so your forgiven
just to love others you are driven

Except maybe the mailman
for him you disdain
I think in a different world
he caused your species pain

Oh, little jack Russell
some say you need a muzzle
I love your little rough and tumble

my best friend
my jack Russell
Caper

     the baper!
About my daughter...oh, that's a scary thought...about my little jack russell
Francie Lynch Jan 2016
They thought she'd be Sassy,
You'll read she's no Lassie;
So they chose an Isle,
For kin and kith,
Meaning more than breadth and width;
Henceforth she's called Skye.

She's a dimunitive terrier,
She'll not be a harrier;
She'd fall down the holes
Chasing rabbits and voles,
And never be heard of again.

Too quiet for a guard dog,
In the pack, she's no lead dog;
If she tried herding sheep,
They'd bleat in their sleep,
And the sheep would lay down
For the wolves.

She's no sledder like Buck,
She can't carry a duck,
And certainly no fighter like Fang.
She's no Rin Tin Tin,
Can't run fast like him,
And she's not sleek like Roy Rogers' Bullet.

She won't find a body
Buried under the snow,
And she won't win blue ribbons
At any dog show.
But I'm convinced
By her snuffles
She's well worth the trouuble,
I'll take her out hunting
In the woods
For my truffles.
Dog sitting my buddy's Boston Terrier. Terrible how in-breeding has resulted in serious breathing problems for the Bostons.
Incidently, Boston Terriers are superior truffle hunting dogs, and the best time for that is at night. Skye, rocks it at night.
Todd Monjar Dec 2015
Waves come to greet me like curious dogs inspecting a new person, testing for good or bad.

Tentative yet friendly, playful and carefree, omnipotent and elevated with tender edges; touching, sniffing, wary but hopeful.

Hopeful that there is a place for the inevitable.

Hopeful that they will be cared for; perpetuated even knowing that it is the breath of the universe.

Vast and whole, powerful and massive; while gently and meekly ever dissipating.

But not ending, feeding itself and sustaining the ebb.

Flowing like a mane of lava, brushed and rippled by a cold October wind; carrying the scents of galaxies past, and of future stars.

Nudging, licking, smiling; a loving way for fearful and weary travelers.
Elizabeth Dec 2015
In my white tights, I watched
Dad cry in our kitchen.
He rested on the sink,
Palms sweating and white-knuckled.
We heard Mikey by the door
Ask dad politely
With a defeated whisper
For a comforting pat,
A silent scratch behind old
Folded skin on his Rottweiler ear.

The home phone, chunky and beige,
Laid face down on the wooden counter
Soaked in saline.
Dad was to take Mikey
To the vet in the evening,
Bring him home, cold and cancerous,
And rub his webbed, iced toes
Between index and ring
In a fleeting moment, one last time.
But he never picked up the phone.
It laid dormant, an incessant hum
In Dad’s brain, radiating to the base of his spine.
Instead we each
Kissed Mikey’s brow,
Smushed his extinguishing face
In our palms,
Turning off the lamps.

Mom took off my untwirled tutu,
Putting unmatching pajamas on me.
We forgot to pray, both pirouetting
Thoughts between our fingers
Of what death is like.

I woke up to French toast
And my answer
Served on a blue plastic plate -
A smudge of tear on the rim.
The phone lay on the counter
Crusted in salt, adjacent
To Mikey’s frayed and rusted collar.
Six Flowers Dec 2015
The dog and me, we'll find the sea
And run beside the waves
I'll slip on stones, he'll hunt for bones
Beside the sea, the dog and me.

Beside a fire, burning higher
Than any human pain could be
We'll slowly sleep, as embers leap,
And sorrows won't exist for me.

I'll find a dog as lost as me
And offer him my bones.
And if he loves me, tired and small,
We'll share a life, our love, our all.

The dog and me, we'll find the sea
That washes broken love away.
I'll wake for him; he'll wait for me.
We'll always be; the dog and me.
Devin Ortiz Nov 2015
Two wayward souls lost at sea
Depression weighed heavy on he
Terrified of this cold world was she

Drifting alone,
The sea salt saps hope
Of a good life, even as the storm passes
This tired man flats into the Abyss

Drifting alone,
The dark ocean pulls at pad foots
No concept of love, an void concept
Abandoned home, drowning her tears

By nature's fortune, enter the whirlpool
Which graciously accepts the lost
Drifting together into the danger
The torrents send them off
Two wayward souls lostin each other.
Just a piece to give voice to rescuing my dog from the streets as a puppy.
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