Lost hope, lost life,
A desire lost inside.
A warrior never fought,
A friend who lost.
Is it necessary to desire?
Her gaze,
Her laughter,
Her truth—
Just wanted to admire.

Thin, lost—
Sin, and cost.
What is this?
A person,
Or just a shoe?

Wasted life, wasted time,
The stupid wanted to earn a dime.
How good is he,
How kind can he be?
Is he graduated,
Or even educated?

Know this,
Know that—
Are you alive,
Or are you dead?

Give me money,
Take this knowledge.
Give me test,
Take this certificate.
What do you want to be?
Tell me—
Everyone asked me.

"I want to study,"
He said—
Indeed, a lie.
God knows why.

Inside a tree,
He wants to live.
No human,
No chase,
No dream,
No game.

What is he?
A movie,
Or a disgrace?

Is writing a gift,
Or is it a curse?
I could be a doctor, a lawyer, a nurse,
But i chose to be a disgrace instead.

I sit in my room, writing nonsense
That no one's ever gonna read.
Random words, without any context
Among other plants, a simple ****

A normal person sees this as a waste of time,
Takes away my notebook
Little did they know, it was the only thing keeping my sanity intact.

expecting a boom -
but it was only a whisper.
expecting a spectacle -
but it only got dimmer.
expecting praise -
when only deserving of pity.
just when you couldn’t finish the race
was the distance travelled all a waste?
fell too short, a disgrace
when the expectation wasn’t my fate.

the hardest thing to do in a world of lies
is to learn to trust again
the endless void of crippling apathy
consumes as a chasm of pain
the hardest thing to do in a world of hate
is to love yourself to death
the endless void of crippling apathy
was not allowed first breath
it was born dead
but not allowed to die
disgraceful abomination of the chasm of pain
if life is cloth this is its stain
my god did not bear witness to its worship
no soul left to claim
and so his silent pleas were thrown aside, worthless prayers in the rain
no soul left aside
in the chasm of pain

We live in a world surrounded with friendly monsters
disguised as friends, family, relatives and folksters.
Be wary of whom you let tame you
and be wary of whose cage and stables you enter into
for it will be invisible behind pretty smiles
hidden behind small talks and small walks in dangerous aisles
a journey seeming utterly beautiful like snowflakes in winter
but in reality, they’ll all use you, disgrace you and leave you bitter.

-fir.m