It is 1am,
I just played minecraft on our server,
which has mostly been abandoned.
Good memories and happy thoughts.

It is still 1am,
The discord call is muted.
The only sound is the Lo-Fi from the music bot.
I am calm.

It is 1am,
and I am thinking about how much I love my friends.
Thank you, for everything, I am glad we exist.

I was fine enough on my own
and then I met you
who animated my heart of stone
then turned it blue
wondering what I'll do
when this thing is through.
I'd swim through tides of the apocalypse
just to reach your apocryphal hips
but my cacophonous wit
tells me I should probably quit
because you're better than I
so I fear you'll sever our tie
then I'll pull a lever and die.

I try not to think
I try not to sink
I try not to blink
after the Kool-Aid I drink
casts an enchantment
of life enhancement
I couldn't have planned it
so I just say **** it
flying to another planet
with an atmosphere uncertain
I can't see past this dumb curtain
made by time
my maybe mind
makes me whine
that it's not fair
that your soft hair
has me locked there
waiting for the final judgment
wishing for your sublet
guessing I'll be upset
at another lonely sunset.

Please don't mind me
I've just been alone a long time
seeing the signing
that for a home there's a long line
and I don't have a ticket
to get the biscuit
I jest I missed it
because I blessed a misfit
which stole my youth
and made me uncouth
I couldn't regroup
and then I saw you.
I feel loneliness so strongly
I search for a sense of belonging
but might be doing so wrongly
when I think that anyone on me
will provide an awning
for the fear spawning
over existential odd me
who thinks servile fawning
will leave people wanting.

I wish I could pull a ripcord
to ignore
the dim floor
implored
by inner discord
but I just described you
a conundrum it's true
you create room
for thunder and gloom
then sunder it too.

Peace rings with Harmonia's song
Balance floats with your soft hymns
Winds skip past, flowing effortlessly as leaves dance
My eyes open, all is shed, and clarity sets

Your frequencies screech
Chaos jabs at the foundation
Shadowed by Eris's blackened wings
Uprooting and dismantling me, but why?

We exist together, to bring growth

Secrets can make you
Secrets can break you

Secrets shape us
Secrets divide us
Secrets drop a wall between us

Dividing families with no one the wiser
How can they not see this?
It’s right there

Between us

What if I tell?
What if they know?
What if they judge?

The scariest outcome would be
If nothing changes

And the wall of secrets wasn’t
The real divide

Between us

I be
the feeling of an answer

not
the urgency
of a question

In a very distant land I believe there is a
King; he is old decrepit and withered; no
Servants and no Knaves beside him; no
Queen to be the solace of his miserable
Being; he perched upon his throne and
Do nothing but beholds his sank in
Calamity Kingdom; the old tokens of His
Might and Sway may still be visible;
Bearing no power though; his mantle is
Crimson but dusty and shabby;
Somewhere even stiffened and resembles
A crust; his skin is placid and paled and
Peeling with flakes which fall and mound near au pied of his throne; no sounds
Resound but his moans and groans
From pain or from despair or some other
Misery is not known; but the thing that is
True is the fact that he suffers and craves
For the former boons; he wishes his plight
Was restored to that of an ephebe; but
Alas; leave all thy hopes thou King since
Long Ago of Nothing; forsaken is thy
Kingdom, come no prosper to thee nor
Posterity will thrive nor any herb will reside
These barren lands of yours; for we reap
What we sow and when thou sowest
Tempest
Thou shalt reap the sprouts of
Despondency

This isn't a poem, it's a thank you. Thank you all so much for, bein there for me. And inspiring me to know what I have. And thank you all for lifting me up with some of your comments. If anyone would love to talk to me, or anything don't be afraid to text me on discord. https://discord.gg/SBFp4m
Thank you for excepting me when others, wouldn't. I a glad to be in the Hello Poetry family with such talented and amazing people

They come in unannounced,
united, and uninvited,
demanding my attention
my hands and body are in pose with contention
at the fault of being self aware
I let these thoughts linger,
letting them leave their mark
streaks, smudges and smears
leaving when they please, only to soon return
Tears down my face,
Lord where is the grace?
A curse at times of the mindful