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x Jul 2020
"i'll see you soon
by the next full moon
it won't be long, just wait."

the next moon came
nothing had changed
it wasn't written in our fate.

"wish you were here
so i could hold you near
and talk and laugh all day."

it wasn't to be
so i'd wait patiently
there were rules we had to obey

four months have gone by
every day i have cried
just sad and feeling alone.

"i miss you too much
i so crave your touch
i'd rather be there than at home."

just come and meet me
we'll do it discreetly
we don't have to tell anyone.

"now i just miss you more
and it's left my heart sore
and wondering, what have we done?"
the battle with willpower and ethics of seeing your s/o during lockdown and the consequences of a "quick fix" meet that will usually have you more desperate than before
Cattatonicat Jul 2020
Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
All of them,
So desperate, so desperate

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Letting them deceive me,
Because I want to see their true faces

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
Looking into their eyes, into their homeless souls
They think they can make a home in Hell,
None of them know
Hell wasn’t built for them
Hell was built for refugees of Heaven
For freedom, to be away from the devils carrying out Heaven’s deeds.

Here I am,
Dancing with the devils
To take a good look at everything Heaven doesn’t want to show
Cattatonicat Jul 2020
Disgusting
Unpleasant
Rotting
Selfish
Materialistic
Disrespectful­
Weak
Desperate
Rude
Arrogant
Controlling
Racist
Deceitful
Vermin­ous
aspen wilde Jun 2020
desperately trying to extinguish the fire of my mind,
burning the pain on paper,
not on the edge of a knife.
Henriette Jun 2020
my dear heart,
it's flying
flying aloft
it might reach nirvana .

in the deep sea of desperate
you fell and scattered
i'm in the verge of expectation.
hoping for you would come back one day
How many times will I wash my face to feel satisfied with the work Ive put in?
How many mirrors will I have to look in until I’m comfortable in my own skin?
Will the weight of the world be lifted off if I start at the gym?
Are all the troubles I face, a reflection of the **** that I am?
Or no, are they just here? a constant reminder that if I interfere, I’ll just be more tired, more full of what I will fear, if I lose control of stopping....
Empire May 2020
I’m angry with love
I thought I’d finally found it
Even with red flags in the air

I’d gone so long
Wondering if I could be loved
Needing to be loved
And I... I was so desperate
To mistake the mess that I’d made
For love

I just... I needed it...
I wanted it so badly...
That when I saw a chance
For any real kind of connection
I threw everything I had at it
I barreled past the warning signs
And all the caution tape
For that chance
That impossible chance



And it broke me.
tmartin May 2020
like a cat
i’m waiting for my owner
in my case, more gropes.
i am vain
i regularly conjure up poetry on my skin
do not give me yours.
i will recite every word to my last paper breath
so i can kid myself that paper is power.
my hands, are a canvas
canvas for anyone's ***** thoughts and ***** details
for if enough titles are painted on my body then perhaps
i will learn the complex trick
at trick of gaining depth.
and maybe the world will look as full.
as full and real as i
attest about it
read about it
dream about it
vision about it in books,
or dance with in music,
and maybe perhaps my edges will stop being ripped;
or my corners cut
or maybe my pages will not be burned and tossed aside.
true;
sometimes, i am this tiny
sometimes, i am this entangled
sometimes, i am this bonded
vulnerable, and judged by many
but also sometimes i am full of wonder

but right now, i am this.


|  i am paper and no wonder i like words |
Excerpts from [Desperate Acts by tma_rtin]
Liyanne May 2020
Just like a moth
I'm drawn to your light
Desperate to find warmth
During these cold nights
I have to be cautious
of whats real or fake
One wrong move
and my life is at stake
Risk
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